band au;
[ yingxing exhales hard.
his ears still ring with the music, his blood thrumming with excitement. for all the years that highcloud has been together now, he never really tires of this work. he loves what he does, loves his bandmates no matter how often they butt heads, loves everything about their music. it's hard work, exhausting even at the best of times, and there are certainly many downsides to fame and celebrity status, but this.. playing together, making music, performing, he's passionate about it. the riches and fame are secondary to doing what he loves.
they're halfway through their rehearsal now, splitting up to take a break and rehydrate, and it's as he's guzzling down some water from a bottle that yingxing spots dan heng, dan feng's quiet, elusive little brother.
they've met before, but only briefly, only in passing. while dan heng is supportive of his brother and the band, he's a bit of a recluse, and he's never really gone out of his way to interact with any of them beyond dan feng - so what's he doing here right now? yingxing can't resist the urge to pester him, not when he knows he might not get the chance to again for some time now.
so, wiping sweat from his brow, yingxing wanders toward the table where dan heng has set up shop, surrounded by books and papers, lit by the glow of his laptop and tablet. ]
Long time no see.
[ entirely uninvited, yingxing pulls up a seat across from dan heng, straddling it backwards, leaning his forearms on the back of the steel chair. his hair is wild and his skin is flushed and dewy with sweat, adrenaline still pumping, his grin broad and easy. ]
Surprised you can concentrate with all this noise.
his ears still ring with the music, his blood thrumming with excitement. for all the years that highcloud has been together now, he never really tires of this work. he loves what he does, loves his bandmates no matter how often they butt heads, loves everything about their music. it's hard work, exhausting even at the best of times, and there are certainly many downsides to fame and celebrity status, but this.. playing together, making music, performing, he's passionate about it. the riches and fame are secondary to doing what he loves.
they're halfway through their rehearsal now, splitting up to take a break and rehydrate, and it's as he's guzzling down some water from a bottle that yingxing spots dan heng, dan feng's quiet, elusive little brother.
they've met before, but only briefly, only in passing. while dan heng is supportive of his brother and the band, he's a bit of a recluse, and he's never really gone out of his way to interact with any of them beyond dan feng - so what's he doing here right now? yingxing can't resist the urge to pester him, not when he knows he might not get the chance to again for some time now.
so, wiping sweat from his brow, yingxing wanders toward the table where dan heng has set up shop, surrounded by books and papers, lit by the glow of his laptop and tablet. ]
Long time no see.
[ entirely uninvited, yingxing pulls up a seat across from dan heng, straddling it backwards, leaning his forearms on the back of the steel chair. his hair is wild and his skin is flushed and dewy with sweat, adrenaline still pumping, his grin broad and easy. ]
Surprised you can concentrate with all this noise.
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At some point, he ended up changing schools; with that change came the decision to use cloudhymn magic to conceal the truth of his identity. People would still comment that he looked like the famous rocker, but—well, he was human, so he couldn't be related, right?
University, Dan Feng had promised, would be better, but in the end he's found it easier to maintain the disguise, to introduce himself as sparingly as possible, to stick to the small friend groups he's found along the way.
(March and Stelle are the only people who know the truth about him, too—something he regrets on occasion when March makes a silly comment far too loudly for anyone's liking, and he's forced to watch in disdain-concealed frustration as Stelle rushes to shut her up.)
So—
Right. The aloof thing. Really, it's just easier that way. And the less time he spends entangled with the band themselves, the better. It gives him plausible deniability, after all.
It also makes it significantly easier to hide the fact that he's among their biggest fans.
As it is, forced to come along to practice tonight by car troubles, he's had to cover up a laptop sticker or two, move his white-and-purple Blade wristband to an ankle, signs that in the real world aren't too obvious or attention-grabbing, but in this room will give him away faster than his tail suddenly popping back into existence. But he's done what he needed to, secured himself and found a corner and done his best to study despite the (wonderful) noise, thumbing through pages after pages of history and data analysis textbooks,
and really he thinks he's just about gotten away with it too, when a break comes and suddenly
Blade, in all his gloryhis brother's friend Yingxing is sitting in front of him, all ridiculously-tight jeans and wild hair and wide smile.Dan Heng's breath stutters. The wristband, hidden under his own lightweight pants, brands his skin with the heat of its burn. He tries to force a friendly—but distant—smile. What happens on his face instead is something infinitely more constipated and uncomfortable. ]
Yes... You're right. Long time no see, Yingxing. [ A breath, and he clears his throat. Saying his name sounds far too intimate—stupid, stupid— ] My car broke down, so I'm riding along with my brother for today.
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Ah, right. Sorry you're stuck here with us for awhile.
[ he drops his chin to rest against his folded forearms over the back of the chair. he realizes that he's likely disrupting dan heng's studies more than the music had right now, but it won't last too long, soon they'll be back to rehearsing the second half of their show.
raising his brows, he briefly scans dan heng's textbooks. ]
What's your major?
[ dan feng told him once, he knows - it was something nerdy. coding? math? something like that. ]
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There's no need for you to apologize, [ he answers, voice quiet, matter-of-fact. ] You weren't responsible for my car breaking down.
[ Ugh, he wants to hit himself with Stelle's baseball bat. He's glad for the question, then, if only because it takes the attention away from the idiotic thing he's said. He coughs, and his fingertips run over the spine of a book. ]
I'm doing a double, [ he explains. ] History with a focus on the homeworld of the Xianzhou, and data analysis. I'm not entirely sure what I want to do with it just yet, but I've learned a lot.
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Dan Feng told me you were smart, but a double major? That's impressive.
[ and not easy majors, either. history is dense, and data analysis takes a sharp mind - dan heng certainly is challenging himself. yingxing nods, then lifts his eyes back up to dan heng's face. ]
Well, you don't need to decide on what you want to do just yet, but you've got plenty of options with those avenues.
[ the corner of his mouth twists, and yingxing winks. ]
Take your time, yeah?
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That wink—
Damnit, he's going to kill Dan Feng for bringing him here.
For now, though, he reaches for his bottle of water, trying to retain some of his usual image. How pathetic, that all it took was a smile and a wink to practically rip off his usual mask?
(His voice sounds ragged around the water, even as he clears his throat.) ]
I... Thank you. I'll keep that in mind, and try not to pressure myself into making a choice too early.
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then again, dan heng doesn't visit with them often. yingxing can count on two hands the amount of times he's seen the young man show his face around them openly in the past decade since the band first got together. he'd been so young then, likely hardly remembers his brother's friends making noise in the spacious garage of the dan family's estate.
but that does make him wonder.. ]
You look different, lately.
[ he says, then sits up a little straighter, lifting a hand to playfully flick at dan heng's short fringe. ]
I remember you looking more like your brother.
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But... no. He's being ridiculous.
(A deep, calming breath.)
Yingxing is only asking him a question that makes sense for him to ask, given how long the two of them have known one another.
He reaches up, smooths his bangs back into place.
(His ankle twitches, an impossible reminder of the touch pressed so briefly against his skin.)
And, after a moment taken to collect himself, he manages a small smile, wry in nature as he shakes his head. ]
One could argue too much like my brother. You don't need me to tell me how many fans your band has. My high school years were... [ He grimaces, and shakes his head once more; this time, as he talks, he lifts his hand to where his ear curves, human-like—where he can still feel his true ear emerging from behind it, invisible and unseen. ] This... this is just cloudhymn magic, but it makes it slightly easier to get by.
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but it's difficult not to, especially when dan heng makes it so easy, and when he looks so damned cute, blushing right to his ears. ]
Right.. that makes sense.
[ not everyone is built for fame, not everyone wants it, and he can only imagine the difficulties that dan heng has faced, growing up with a brother like his own. he's a quiet little thing, soft and a bit shy, the type to prefer to keep his head down, or so yingxing gathers. having a brother famous across the cosmos - and, let's be real, lusted after as well - isn't an easy position. ]
Well, you're cute either way. Whatever makes you happy, right?
[ he rests his chin against the hand he'd withdrawn. ]
Is it tough, keeping that illusion up all the time?
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(A blush that, when Yingxing calls him "cute", only darkens. Lan help him, March will be dining out on this one for weeks...)
He clears his throat (again), trying for some sort of aloofness in his reply, even as he forces himself to reject the compliment—accepting it would simply be too dangerous: ]
You don't have to say things like that. I've seen the sort of people you date.
[ ...Hmm. The words don't end up landing quite the way he wants them to. His frown deepens, and he shakes his head again, desperately reaching for a topic before the other can address the mistake he's just made. ]
Ignore that, it came out wrong. [ Straight-faced. Calm. (Heart pounding.) ] At any rate, your question... It was hard at first, until I got used to it. Now, I really only have trouble when I'm sick, or when I haven't slept well.
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.. oh? You have, huh?
[ some people might be offended by a comment like that, and yingxing might be too, were this coming from someone different - he's an arrogant man, after all, and prideful to a fault sometimes - but dan heng isn't just anyone. he should let it go, but..
instead he smiles, and barrels right past the rest of dan heng's commentary. ]
What sort of people do I date, hmm?
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This is not where he wanted this conversation to go, and yet here they are, with Yingxing leaning in close, smile playful and teasing, something flirty in its corners despite the fact that every single person he could name in answer to the question he's asked is a woman.
And, with the exception of one (the manic pixie thief girl), all effortlessly graceful and elegant. There was that manager for one, gentle and kind. The beautiful soloist from Penacony who took the universe by storm but always spoke with such sweet words. The superfan streamer with fans of her own who smiled like the sun.
All women, and all so far removed from an awkward, gangly young man who feels the need to hide himself in the midst of an illusion, just so people will leave him alone.
He sighs, and he hopes that the laugh on his lips sounds genuine. ]
Let's see... In the time that I've known you, there has been a decent number of beautiful women.
[ He's no longer sure where the conversation is going. All he can do is answer the question and hope he sounds detached enough that it doesn't matter. ]
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[ and problematic ones - looking at you, cipher - but not only women. yingxing couldn't lie, he's certainly slept with more women than men, but that's by pure happenstance alone. he's seen men as well, he's seen all sorts, but the notable ones have been women, surely, easy to remember for their own elegance or fame.
dan heng can never find out about what the quintet got up to with each other in their earlier days.. ]
But I still -
[ "Yingxing."
dan feng's voice rings coolly from a distance, and yingxing sits up in his chair, glancing over his shoulder. ah, and there he stands, yinyue, as commanding a presence as ever, one dark eyebrow arched at the two of them, suspicion in his sharp teal eyes. yingxing grins. ]
All right, all right, I was just saying hi to our guest. I'm coming.
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Dan Heng hates what the beginning of that sentence does to him, the sort of questions it raises. On one hand, it was probably something as simple as elaborating on the fact that he likes all types, not just beautiful women.
What if, though, it wasn't just beautiful women?
Ugh. He tries to shake the thought off, and thankfully, his older brother interrupts at the perfect moment, his own protectiveness cutting through the air as cold suspicion. He reaches for his phone, offers Yingxing a brief, cool (he hopes) smile as the other grins, and when he starts to head back to the back, Dan Heng reaches for his phone and opens the group chat he shares with his two best friends.
"We need to talk later."
At least for now he's safe—
or so he thinks, anyway. The band starts their rehearsal up all over again, but Dan Heng can no longer focus on his study. His eyes keep lifting, peering under his lashes to snatch glimpses of the handsome, teasing guitarist...
Damnit. He was doing so well before... ]
I'll make any excuse, coincidence, I knew
And it's not like it's Yingxing's fault that Dan Heng has had a crush on him for years, anyway.
Today, his wristband is back where it belongs, worn on a wrist as the one major outward sign of his fandom. A sign that right now is even more obvious than normal as his clothes pull away from his forearm, leaving it bare but for the purple and white knit. The culprit? A stretched arm, a book on an abysmally tall shelf. He loves this store, but how many times will he have to ask before they get stepladders or something...?
Dan Heng sighs, hand starting to lower from the book. He'll have to ask for help. Again. ]
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there's a cafe here, attached to a tiny little used bookshop, and yingxing steps inside. he's dressed plainly in dark jeans and a loose zip-up hoodie over a black tee, his hair pulled into a messy tail, sunglasses concealing his recognizable violet eyes. he places his order with the barista, tapping his painted fingernail idly on the counter as he allows his eyes to wander while waiting for his order to be fulfilled.
and wouldn't you know it. through the archway that leads to the bookshop, yingxing spies a familiar mop of dark hair. it's been a couple of months since he last spoke with dan feng's cute, awkward little brother, but even still, he breaks out into a grin to see him.
his espresso is finished, and yingxing snags it in one hand, thanking the barista with a generous tip before wandering his way into the bookshop area, slipping around a bookcase just as dan heng reaches for a book far too high for him. cute. and what's that around his wrist..? oh, yingxing would recognize that pattern anyway, knows his merch well. stepping up behind dan heng, he reaches over his head to pluck the dusty book from the shelf, his mouth slanted in a smile. ]
This the one you wanted?
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(He feels guilty even now, because he knows how important the band is to his older brother, but...)
Well, he supports him in his own way, doesn't he?
He's just turned around to go in search of a shopkeep when a taller figure suddenly reaches over him, effectively trapping him against the shelf as it plucks, effortless, the book he wants from over the top of his head. A smile, a question, and—
he might not be the single most pious person in the world, but he's starting to wonder if he's personally done something to piss the Reignbow Arbiter off. ]
Bl— [ The syllable dies on his lips, and he accepts the book, grateful for something to turn his eyes onto, his focus on its dusty spine and very much not the wristband on the hand that holds it
steadilytremblingly.He takes a breath. Standing here gaping won't help anyone, so... ]
That... this is the exact one. Thank you, Yingxing. I was going to have to get someone who worked here to come help.
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he'd suspected that dan heng might be into him during their previous conversation, but now, seeing that bracelet - well.. that's some strong evidence, isn't it? somehow, it excites him. he's got thousands of fans, many of which wouldn't hesitate to throw themselves at a chance with him, yet somehow the idea of dan heng being among them is.. really charming. yingxing pushes his sunglasses to the top of his head, the corners of his eyes crinkling fondly. ]
Well, I'm glad I could save you the trouble.
[ the stacks are close together, leaving them standing very near one another, but yingxing makes no attempt to move. ]
Didn't expect to run into someone I knew here.
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Looking up—
looking up doesn't help. Now he's gazing right up into a fond expression worn in lavender eyes, the space between them far too little for comfort, and... and...
He clears his throat, looks around—is there an escape route? Something?—before Yingxing's words have him looking back up, forcing a smile and nodding. ]
It's... small. Quiet, here. That's usually why I come. There are a lot of good books, and the cafe is a good place for study. But I... [ Another shake of his head. ] What are you doing here? It might be quiet, but you still had to get here somehow...
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[ dan heng fits in here like a fish in a pond. a cozy, quiet bookshop, a little cafe, all tucked away in a sleepy town.. yes, this suits him perfectly. their eyes meet, and yingxing chuckles when dan heng quickly glances away, clearly looking for an out, but yingxing won't make it easy for him. dan feng isn't here to spoil his fun with his overprotection. ]
Want to have some coffee with me? Since we're both here.
[ his eyes flicker down to the bracelet, then up again. ]
Unless you'd rather not spend time with me.
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He has no idea what to do.
So, in the face of that, he does the only thing he can do: deny everything. His lips tremble into a strained smile as he lifts his wrist, sinks a little harder into the stack. ]
This... this was a gift from my best friend. [ True. ] She's a fan, and I... I suppose she thought it would be funny. [ Also true. ] Because of my connection to the band. [ An outright lie. March had given it to him after hours of him silently ogling Blade in a concert video they watched together, and gleefully taken a photo of his shocked, dismayed expression upon pulling it from the box.
He clears his throat. ]
So... yeah. I guess there's no harm in a coffee.
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he shouldn't be thinking that. he's got at least a decade on dan heng, and dan feng would absolutely skin him alive for purposefully flirting with him, but. well. yingxing has no sense of self-preservation. ]
Hey, you don't need to explain it to me. I just appreciate the support for the band, you know?
[ he finally eases up, stepping back from dan heng so that they can begin to move toward the cafe together. ]
.. though it's funny your friend would get you mine, and not your brother's.
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Even disguised as a human, I still get comments sometimes about how I look like him, and she knew I wouldn't want anything to make that connection more obvious than it is. And... you're her favorite member.
[ March 7th, famously a big fan of Jing Yuan and his sweet, sleepy eyes. "He looks like he'd be the best cuddler, you know?" she'd ask, pouting over magazine shoots, all while his own gaze stayed focused on the serious, stoic lead guitarist.
He sighs, moving alongside Yingxing to the cafe. ]
So, now I have this.
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Right, right, of course.
[ he doesn't believe it at all, but he won't push any further, lest dan heng simply implode on the spot. instead, he leads the way, weaving through the stacks toward the cafe again. ]
Well, you can tell your friend thanks for me, then. I'd be glad to sign something for her, if she likes. Anything for a friend of Dan Heng's.
[ definitely for her, and not for him. once they reach the cafe, he corrals dan heng over to the barista with a hand at the small of his back. ]
What kind of drinks do you like?
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[ If he knew what Yingxing was thinking, he'd probably implode. It's a good thing, then, that the other appears to accept his words, guiding him over through the stacks toward the cafe—
although that hand at the small of his back burns him
—until they're standing in front of the barista, and...
and Dan Heng is about to be revealed as the single most boring man in existence. He's never really thought of his drink preferences as embarrassing before, but... well, here he is. ]
Usually I just get plain black coffee, or green tea.
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A pot of coffee to share, then. Cream on the side. Oh, and some water.
[ she smiles in return, quickly busying herself behind the counter to prepare their order, and yingxing turns to lean his back against the counter, removing his hand in the process, likely to dan heng's relief. ]
Next time, we'll do tea.
[ but it's still early enough in the day that it's fine, he thinks, to indulge in some heavier caffeine. ]
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Once they're seated, he nods at the other—but quickly finds his attention drawn to the table, and to the packet of salt he snags from the condiment holder in the middle, playing with it in his fingers, and hating how much he loves the sound of "next time".
Still, he... ]
Next time...? You're making a habit of coming here, then. Isn't this somewhat unsafe for you?
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[ he says openly, easily, as he settles into the seat across from dan heng and leans his forearms against the table.
and then, as if he hadn't said anything unusual at all, he tilts his head and plows on. ]
How are those double majors of yours going? Still at the grind?
[ knowing what he knows of dan heng, the young man is more than likely still nose to the grindstone every day, admirably dedicated to his work. ]
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(not to a fan who so desperately wants them to be serious)
but before he can make any sort of protest, the other keeps talking, asks about his studies.
Dan Heng clears his throat, and nods. ]
Yeah. We're on holidays right now, so I'm not working quite as much. Just trying to keep up with my readings so I don't fall behind later.
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ah, but their drinks are arriving now, the barista setting down the pot of coffee and cream, as well as two cups, and yingxing flashes her a smile with his thanks. after that, he pours for them both. ]
You're pretty studious, huh? I take it you get great marks.
[ he slides dan heng's cup toward him, then pops open a creamer to add to his own cup. ]
I did all right in school, but I'm more of a hands-on sort of person. Before the band took off, I was really into wood and metalworking.
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My best friends would say I'm too studious. But it's not about the marks. This is something I'm passionate about—I want to learn as much as I can. So... studying hard seems like the right thing to do.
[ Another sip, and then Yingxing is talking about his own schooling days, mentioning wood and metalworking, and without a thought Dan Heng nods, allowing himself to join the conversation: ]
That's right. You were into ornamental sword-making for a time, if I recall correctly?
[ And just where did he get that information from—? Dan Heng doesn't even notice what he's said just yet, or what it implies. ]
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Yeah, weaponwork in general. I enjoy it.
[ both ornamental and working steel, he'd even considered applying for that blacksmithing contest tv show, but then everything went down with the band and that went out the window. ]
I'd like to get back to it sometime, when I'm not so busy. It's hard work, but it relaxes me.
[ he stirs in his creamer, then takes a sip. the coffee here is pretty good. little hole in the wall places always have great coffee, in his experience. ]
I'm surprised you know that, I don't talk about it much.
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Which...
Fuck.
Of course he doesn't talk about it much. He mentioned it in one, maybe two interviews, both a while ago now, both comments made in passing.
He clears his throat. ]
Oh, uh. My brother told me about it. [ After Dan Heng found a way to bring it up in conversation, of course..) ] I was researching metallurgical history at the time, and when I said something about it to him, he told me.
[ Had there been any reason to study metallurgical history other than those passing comments in interviews, though? No, but Dan Feng didn't need to know that, and neither does Yingxing.
Which is why the next question is asks is one that he doesn't actually need to, not really. It's just... he needs to give himself some protection, here.
He sips at his coffee. ]
Is that where the name "Blade" comes from, then?
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Yeah, he would know, I guess.
[ yingxing is close with the entire group, but he and dan feng were especially close - he's yingxing's best friend and confidant, so he knows pretty much his entire life story. nothing would stop him from telling dan heng about it all, should it come up in conversation.
he won't ask just why dan heng was researching metallurgy.. ]
But yeah, it is. I enjoyed making weapons, and I was young enough at the time to think that the name Blade was edgy and cool. Embarrassing, I know.
[ but it's what he's stuck with now, and he's fond of it. ]
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What he does do is listen to what the other has to say, a smile on his face—and a soft laugh when the older man calls the tastes of the him of ten years ago "edgy and cool". ]
Was that just a you thing? It seems almost generational. In my age group, everyone wants names like "Stardust" or "Glimmer", but ten years ago... hmm. Yeah, "Blade" fits the average young adult's mood reasonably well, I would say.
[ Historical data analyst go! ]
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It was absolutely a generational thing. I wasn't the only one trying to be edgy.
[ yingxing's smile slants, and he takes another sip of coffee. reminiscing about his cringe era is embarrassing, but funny, at least. he tries not to take himself too seriously. ]
Names like Glimmer or Stardust were absolutely associated with something else, when I was young.
[ an arched brow. ]
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And Dan Heng knows that, despite himself, he's still blushing.
He wonders how far he can get with this nonchalant thing though, and so he looks up at the other, quirks an eyebrow in return. ]
Were they? And what might that be?
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[ little brat. but sure, yingxing will indulge him, and go a bit further, besides. ]
Excellent stripper names. If you were gonna choose one, what would it be?
[ definitely conjuring images of dan heng pole dancing now, though honestly he'd probably be so endearingly awkward about it that it's hard to imagine it as sexy. ]
Shimmerscale? Glitter Draconia?
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Arbiter preserve him, his cheeks are practically generating heat.
He clears his throat. ]
I am... [ A small huff of breath through his nose. ] I'm not really the type.
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No? You don't think so?
[ so sorry dan heng, now that this door has been opened there can be no closing it again, and yingxing is on him like a shark scenting blood. he tilts his head, feigning thoughtfulness, tapping his knuckles to his chin. ]
I don't know, you've got that innocent awkward nerd sort of cuteness about you, there's definitely a market for that.
[ poor dan heng is probably going to explode. ]
I think if I were going to choose one for myself, it's got to be Star, right?
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Dan Heng thinks he might be about to combust. He drops his gaze, despite the other's very clear focus on him, and clears his throat again. Is there some sort of Cloudhymn magic that can calm the rush of heat? Or perhaps just make him sink into the earth itself? Maybe if he texts Stelle, she can come and rescue him—
He coughs. Drinks some coffee. Coughs again.
It doesn't help. ]
Star... like your name.
[ If they were going off names, his own would be pretty boring, he thinks.) ]
But I...
[ Nope, it's too late. His brain is working overtime, imagining Yingxing on a stage in front of him, lip bitten and smile sly as he peels off a too-tight shirt to reveal the muscles underneath, and—
His fingers tighten on the edge of the table. ]
How did we end up on this discussion anyway...? [ An attempt at something sardonic, a roll of his eyes that feels and sounds weak. ]
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his grin cuts across his face, and yingxing shrugs. ]
Names. Don't be mad at me, you're the one who brought up Stardust and Glimmer.
[ even if yingxing went running off with it like the little shit that he is. but they can change the subject. he pours them both fresh cups. ]
Anyway, yeah, Blade was a bit of a choice. People use Ren, too.
[ the xianxhou word for blade's edge. ]
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He takes a slight breath, and once the fresh cup is poured, he takes a sip—and then, in an almost childish response, adds a little cream before sipping again.
(He never drinks his coffee with cream.)
He's grateful for the return in topic though, and so he nods. ]
I think I've heard that. Which do you prefer? Ren seems... affectionate, I suppose. It makes sense for your fans to choose something that sounds a little softer, even if the definition is practically the same...
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[ a good question. he's never really considered this before. ]
I think it depends on the situation. Ren was given to me by the fans, so it's cute when they use it - it feels like a nice little connection, you know?
[ a bond between the fans and himself. it's sweet, that he has enough affectionate fans that they wanted to give him a communal nickname. smiling, yingxing reclines in his chair, crossing his ankles loosely beneath the table. ]
So I think from a fan, I'd prefer to be called Ren. It feels nice.
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He shouldn't have added the cream.
Or should he? Something rebellious pulls at him, makes a breath whisper over his lower lip before he looks up at the other again. His face is serious, but there's a hint of something affable in the way his eyes alight on Yingxing's.
If he added the cream, he can do this one other small thing, right?
He shifts the mug against the table. ]
What about from a friend?
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Oh?
[ a friend, hmm? he likes the sound of that. yingxing's smile brightens, and he tilts his head as he watches dan heng, regarding him curiously. he's teased the poor thing half to death these past weeks, but even still, dan heng wants to be friends?
well, far be it for yingxing to say no. he likes dan heng very much. ]
Well, a friend could just call me Yingxing, hmm?
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The whole thing makes him a little awkward, and he folds his arms over his chest and coughs, more in self-protection than anything else. ]
Y-yes. I suppose that's true.
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Does that make us friends?
[ he'll plow right on by dan heng's awkwardness. aeons know he needs it. so he softens his teasing and instead gives dan heng a fond look, eyes glimmering. ]
I thought you could barely stand me, so I'd take that as a win.
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I'm sorry. I... didn't mean to give that impression.
[ He reaches up, scratches awkwardly behind an ear. He's not about to admit that sometimes he just really sucks at dealing with other people, much less those he's had a crush on for years, but also... ]
If you want to be friends, we're friends.
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Nah, nothing to be sorry for. I know I can be a lot, I don't always get along with everyone.
[ but dan heng.. he likes dan heng. he wants to get along with dan heng, even if he can't help but to tease him a little bit - it's hard not to, when he's so cute and gets flustered so easily. ]
Friends, then.
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[ It's a quiet agreement, the barest, faintest hint of a smile tugging at his lips as he does. The kind of expression usually reserved for March or Stelle—although, despite himself, perhaps just that iota fonder.
He sips at his coffee, and all of a sudden, the cream doesn't taste too bad.
Friends. He can do that. ]
Forever we're together bound in madness
He can't focus, and in the end he tosses the book out of the bed, hears it thump on the floor in finality.
He falls asleep somewhere after that, dozing in and out of consciousness, fitful little starts that somehow seem to make things worse. He goes through three sets of home clothes, each sweated right through and left in a tangled pile on the floor, before he gives up on clothes at all and just lies in a heap on his bed, panting and barely conscious. The only real lucidity he has is to think bitterly that he's never been quite this sick before—
It's not until his phone lights up with a message from Yingxing—something silly about being bored, a picture of whatever he's drinking right now—that Dan Heng realizes with a sickening jolt that he's not ill.
In the end, he doesn't quite know how he makes it to Yingxing's apartment block, only that he's there, and that he hasn't thought to tell the other he's coming. His car fits terribly in the parking space, and by the time he staggers off the elevator, even his cloudhymn magic is failing him—his ears are too pointed to be human, his hair longer than normal in places, horns seeming to flicker in and out of reality as he stands in front of the door.
He knocks, and all but slumps against the doorframe. ]
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so they correspond often, even when they're busy - dan heng with his uni work, yingxing with rehearsals and recording. their tour is coming up in a few months now, there's prep work to be done.
anyway, he's not expecting company tonight, so when there's a knock on the door, yingxing looks up from his scribbled plans with a quizzical look. he's been sketching some weaponry, but he abandons it to stand and head to the door. when he opens the door, however, he doesn't expect dan heng to all but fall into his arms. ]
Hey -
[ wow, he feels so hot all over, and he doesn't look too great either. yingxing's brow pinches in concern. ]
- what's wrong? Are you all right?
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And then the door opens and all at once he realizes the gravity of the mistake he's made. A scent unlike anything he's ever smelled before—something rich and musky, tinged with the same drink he'd seen earlier in the photo—invades all his senses at once, tying his stomach in knots and drawing his brow into a pinched line. He's not quite able to help the way his head tilts, face shifting until it's all but buried in the crook of Yingxing's neck, lips parted in ragged breath, nostrils tickling with the his scent as he breathes it in. His hips come flush to the other man's and he—
Please—
—braces his hands on Yingxing's chest to force himself back a step, eyes wide and chest heaving with quickened breath. ]
I shouldn't have come here. [ His voice is rough, aching at the edges. ]
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dan heng is in heat. he's witnessed dan feng's heats and ruts enough to know exactly what they're like, how they manifest, and how entirely debilitating they can be. poor dan heng, he's sweating through his clothing, overheated and disoriented - the fact that he drove here at all in this state is concerning, and yingxing can't let him drive back like this. ]
Hey, hey, it's okay.
[ he says gently, and pushes the damp hair back from dan heng's eyes, trying to mind the horns that continue to flicker in and out of his vision. ]
Come in, take a nice cool bath, it's gonna be okay.
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—Yingxing is someone to whom he's attracted, someone to whom he'd give everything—
Regardless of anything, this is a mistake.
He's on the verge of flight when that cool, roughened hand reaches for him, pushes his hair back from his skin in a way he can't help but lean into. His eyes close, and somehow through the clouds of fog and scent that make up the whole of his brain now he hears Yingxing offering him a cool bath, and he nods into him, sinks into it with a trembling sigh. ]
I—okay..
[ No. No. Not when—
He shakes his head, looks up at Yingxing as he does. There's a turquoise gleam to his eyes that shouldn't be there, a glow the magic usually hides, and yet they're still murky and confused, swimming with something more than normal. ]
No, I... Yingxing, I can't. This is... it's the first time, I...
[ He shouldn't be here, not when he has no idea how much self-control he'll have. ]
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that complicates things. he knows that the first can be unpredictable, and intense, and dan heng has never experienced it before to know how it will manifest for him, and how well he'll be able to control it. when he leans into yingxing's arms, he loops his arms around him, cradling him gently, but it isn't long before dan heng is pulling away again, torn, and clearly struggling. ]
Look.. Dan Heng, I can't make these choices for you, but I won't let you drive in this condition. You're lucky you made it here in one piece at all.
[ his hands grasp at dan heng's upper arms, squeezing. ]
So do you want me to drive you home? You can stay here, if you want to. Take a bath, and sleep in my bed. I'll be here if you need anything, because this is gonna last awhile, right?
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Strong hands grab his arms. Squeeze. Spiced musk tickles his nose, and he feels his knees tremble under his own weight. Even as he struggles to process what's going on around him, part of his brain is surrounding him with that scent, imagining what it might be like to drown in it, for it to fill him and swallow the ache.
His mouth runs dry. There's a rush of heat between his legs, and Dan Heng sucks in a sharp breath. He wants to be here, but— ]
Please, [ he says, and even his normally-low voice is closer to a whisper, ] Don't judge me for anything I say or do. I'm not... in control.
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No judgment. You don't need to worry.
[ and honestly, from what he knows through dan feng, it's better to be with someone when this happens, to not be alone. he should really call dan feng, but.. he can imagine that for dan heng, this sort of thing would be humiliating to tell your sibling about, even if dan feng would want to know.
nevertheless, dan heng is confiding in him, so yingxing will respect that. he finally closes and locks the door, then sets a hand at dan heng's back to lead him up the nearby iron stairs, to his loft bedroom. everything has a modern, industrial sort of flair, most of the upholstery dark, the walls bare brick and inset with floor to ceiling warehouse windows that offer a spectacular view of the luofu. there's an en suite bathroom, which is where yingxing brings him, releasing him so he can lean over to begin running the bath. ]
Take as long as you need, okay? I'm going to go get you some water.
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Under any other circumstance, he'd wait for the water before stripping down, he really would. But his clothes are uncomfortable, damp through with sweat and more, and the raw scent of the other man in this room especially is too much for him; he strips down and leaves his garments on the floor before he steps into the bath, hissing in relief at the cool water on his skin.
One small bit of relief. There could be more, too. It would be so easy to just—
His head tilts back against the tiles, eyes half-lidded, his grip on his cloudhymn magic gone, breath low and panting, fingers of both hands in a white-knuckled grip on the sides of the bath. Not here. Not here, no matter how blessedly good everything smells— ]
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he's not surprised to find that dan heng has stripped down already - he'd sweat clean through his clothing, and with as how hot he was all over, yingxing can hardly blame him for wanting to get into the water immediately. so he steps over dan heng's clothing on the floor, then makes absolutely, completely sure to keep his eyes on dan heng's face as he leans in to set the glass and pitcher down on a shelf by the tub. his cloudhymn disguise has dissipated fully by now, leaving dan heng looking..
.. well, so much like his brother, for one, but still very different. his face is softer, rounder where dan feng's is sharp, his eyes gentler, his horns less angular. there are similarities, sure, but for someone who knows them both very well, the difference between them is obvious. but damn, he's even more beautiful like this than he is normally, and that's saying something -
ahem. yingxing kneels, resting one arm against the lip of the tub. ]
Hey, try to relax. You're going to break your fingers. You have to get through this thing one way or another, and fighting it the whole way is just going to exhaust you.
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His eyes flutter open, and it takes them a moment to catch properly onto Yingxing's face, something in the other's expression—or is it the strong musk in his nose?—that has him shift, rub his legs against each other as if somehow that will offer some sort of relief.
(It doesn't.)
To the statement, the best he can do right now is shake his head, lifting one trembling hand for the water. He gulps down half the glass in one go before putting it back on the shelf, clouded eyes seeking out the older man's. ]
—Have to—
[ He cuts himself off with a soft groan. Now he can't even get a full sentence out? A swipe of his tongue over his lips, and he tries again: ]
I have to fight it, though. It wants something from me, and I can't—
I can't.
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You can't?
[ his concern only seems to deepen, but yingxing doesn't press. at least not yet. maybe dan heng will feel better once he's soaked in the cool water for awhile, allowing it to leech the terrible heat from his body. their eyes meet, and yingxing's expression is soft with sympathy; poor dan heng, it's clear that this is weighing heavily upon him. ]
All right, just.. if there's anything you need, however small, call on me, okay?
[ he's trying incredibly hard to ignore the inherent eroticism of the moment, the way dan heng's body shifts, the way he licks his lips. ]
Take as long as you like, in here. Fill it up as many times as you want. [ he says, unfolding himself from the floor and getting to his feet. ] If you need a refill on that pitcher, just yell for me.
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And Yingxing is nice enough that if Dan Heng asked—
But it wouldn't be real, and so he can't. Not to mention the fact that his body isn't what the other would expect it to be, and...
Right. He can't.
That's the decision he's made, and he's sticking to it no matter how rich the intermingling of spice and musk is as it tickles his nose.
He nods, the movement stiff. Maybe, if the other closes the door on his way out, he can get himself some relief, just some
(and he shouldn't, this isn't his house, isn't his tub, but reason is starting to fail quickly as sympathetic, gentle eyes meet his, and Dan Heng wonders what they'd look like burning with the same heat that aches between his legs—)
He all but chokes on his answer as he nods. ]
I. Right. Yes, thank you.
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[ he reaches to gently muss dan heng's hair with his palm one more time - a silent reminder that he's here, and not going anywhere - before he finally withdraws and, unfortunately for dan heng, surely closes the door behind him. look, he's pretty much expecting that he'll jerk off in there, and he doesn't mind, though he knows he couldn't say as much without dan heng hitting the roof. but really, he's suffering. anything that might bring relief is good.
with a sigh, he scrubs his face with both hands. if anything happens these coming nights, dan feng is absolutely going to skin him alive, but.. respectfully, this isn't about him. this is about what dan heng needs, regardless of yingxing's feelings toward the young man, and how absolutely, ridiculously willing he'd be to help him through this however he needs.
for now, yingxing sets about working, making sure the bed is straightened, and extra towels are left at the foot in case dan heng needs them, as well as an extra thermos of ice cold water at the bedside. he'll need more than just water, but for now, this is good enough. once he's sure that anything dan heng might need is within reach, yingxing finally heads back downstairs to the work he'd left behind, though he now finds it exceedingly difficult to concentrate. ]
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Dan Heng hates the way his head tilts toward the palm, hates more the soft sound that escapes his lips as it leaves him. Embarrassing. Although what's even moreso is the way the guitarist closes the door behind him, as if he's read the younger man's thoughts.
Moreso, but not enough to stop his hand from slipping down over his body within minutes of the other being gone, the motion almost automatic. He doesn't touch himself often, has never really found the need, but now he's driven by something entirely different, by instinct that has him biting back a groan at the first brush of his fingertips over his slit.
Too loud—
Fingers part his lips while another ghosts over him, exploring—he doesn't let himself linger for long though before he starts to fuck himself open, two fingers working fast and deep. It's easy for his brain to pretend that they're not even his own digits, that they're attached instead to an easy smile and lavender eyes, a thought that has him biting into his wrist in an effort to shut himself up; when the first orgasm of his heat takes him, it's his lip he bites instead to hold back a too-familiar name, even as his voice slips and echoes off the tiles. ]
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.. which means that that sharp, guttural moan floats down the stairs and right to his ears. it's muffled, of course, and made unclear by distance, but still incredibly obvious. yingxing's face grows hot, a tightening in his gut as he takes a deep breath, and tries to focus on his work. he's going to have to get used to this, if dan heng is going to be staying here while he rides out his heat.
too bad no one passed on that memo to his dick.
rubbing at his face again, yingxing exhales hard and stands again, heading to the kitchen to fetch his own ice cold water now. he's going to need it. ]
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—it's once he emerges, wrapped in a towel, that Yingxing's scent hits him all over again, strong as the bricks that make up the wall, and with it the realization of what was wrong with the bathroom in the end, as his own desperate, heat-laced scent drenched the room in sex and need. ]
I'm out.
[ His voice wobbles. He makes his way to the bed and curls up—first on top of it, and then more in it, grabbing the sheets and blankets and pulling them around him. His face presses into the blanket, inhaling the other's scent. ]
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but soon enough the door opens, and dan heng calls out in a ragged voice. yingxing exhales hard. at the very least, he's prepped some food while dan heng was in the bath, and now there's a tub of curry in the fridge, and a second tub of congee with vegetables. easy to reheat.
he takes the stairs back up to find dan heng nestled into his bed, looking sweet and soft; yingxing clears his throat. ]
I made some congee and curry, should be good to reheat whenever you like. Let me know if you want any.
[ he's got to keep up his strength. seating himself on the edge of the bed, yingxing reaches to rub dan heng's hair again. ]
Feeling any better?
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Dan Heng's eyes blink back open, and he lifts his head just a little, torn between scent and affection.
Congee... and curry. The thought of food has his stomach turn over in a strange mix of hunger and revulsion. He needs to eat, hasn't eaten all day, but also he—is he even hungry for anything else that isn't more of this? He's not sure.
But he should eat.
To Yingxing's question, he nods slowly. Thankfully, the other is calm enough about the whole thing that he doesn't fully realize he's been heard (though logic, once it sets back in after his heat is over, will make that realization for him); it makes it easier to lean into him, to allow himself to be cared for. ]
I... a little, yes. The cool bath helped abate some of the fever for now.
[ The orgasms did more, but he doesn't mention that. ]
I could eat.
[ A pause, and then, his voice thick with awkwardness: ]
...Thank you, Yingxing.
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yingxing smiles, rubbing the pad of his thumb over dan heng's cheek, tracing beneath his eye. he looks so lovely like this, and it would be all too easy to lean in, to take what they both want right now, but - no. he's no fool, he knows that dan heng is into him, that he has been into him since before their friendship began, but taking him like this.. it doesn't feel right. not unless dan heng says he wants it. ]
You're very welcome. I'll go grab a bowl for you, you just sit tight.
[ he says with a smile, then draws back again to head downstairs once more, heading into the kitchen to scoop a bowl of congee and veggies for dan heng, before heating it up for him a little. then, he carries it back up again on a small bamboo tray. ]
Still awake?
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Dan Heng wraps himself tight in the covers and blinks, in genuine mortification, against tears that suddenly want to spring to his eyes. He doesn't cry, he never cries, but with his body so out of his control...
Luckily, he has himself under control again before Yingxing climbs the stairs once more. He's able to sit up, wrapped tightly enough in the towel to conceal everything, nodding his answer to that question as he accepts the tray with a small smile. And in the end, despite the twisted feeling in his guts, he's able to eat most of it, the warmth of the congee soothing as it settles in him, the vegetables cooked perfectly to mix in with it. ]
Thank you, [ he says again, as he hands the tray back, tiredness crashing over him like a wave—and before long at all he finds himself asleep, curled up in the covers and breathing in Yingxing's scent.
A few hours pass like that, peaceful and calm. But Dan Heng's heat is far from abated. It's around 2am when he wakes up, slick with sweat and arousal, panting into the rich scent of the cover into which his face is buried. Somehow, it's not enough, and it's almost in a trance that he spends the next several minutes up and moving around Yingxing's room, stealing clothes and piling them on the bed, making the other man's scent richer before snuggling into it again.
It helps a little. The next hour or so is fitful, Dan Heng drifting in and out of sleep, comforted by the scent of the other but still needing something else. He drinks from the water left at the bed, but it doesn't help—his body craves one thing, and one thing only, and...
Arbiter help him, this is so embarrassing when Yingxing is surely asleep on the couch downstairs, but... there's nothing for it, and there's almost no self control in the way he slips a hand under the towel, fingers pushing into his sopping, aching cunt as he moans into his other hand. ]
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so he flicks the television on to some random romcom and drifts off to sleep on the couch, his mind full of dan heng, worrying about him. but he's safe here, at least, and yingxing is a light enough sleeper that he'll wake should dan heng try to leave in a fit of fevered heat.
light enough that dan heng's voice, barely carrying from up the stairs to the loft, is enough to rouse him.
awake immediately, yingxing kicks his blankets down and climbs to his feet, hurrying up the stairs to make sure that dan heng is all right. it should probably occur to him that the noise that dan heng made was one of pleasure not of pain or distress, but given that he's half awake..
well, he rushes quickly to the bedside, hardly thinking. ]
Dan Heng - is everything all right? What do you need?
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Surely.
Surely not, if the sudden flurry of feet on the stairs has anything to say about it. Dan Heng gasps, tears his fingers free of himself (biting hard on his lower lip to prevent a whine from slipping out), wipes them on the towel as well as he can—
Just in time for that rich scent to fill his nose all over again.
He looks up at Yingxing with wide eyes, shakes his head slowly. ]
I... no, I'm alright...
[ Or so he says. He doesn't think about, can't see the way his legs are sliding against one another, almost grinding against himself, trying to get some relief even as he's buried in a pile of the other's things much bigger than that with which he started—shirts, pants, even an undergarment or two, thieved in a state out of his mind. ]
S-sorry if I woke you.
[ It would be so easy—all he'd have to do is reach out—and he could have him, couldn't he? ]
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right. yingxing rubs a palm into his eyes, feeling like a complete moron. now he's just invaded dan heng's privacy and likely mortified the young man and himself in the process. but it is what it is, there's no taking it back, so instead yingxing sighs and looks to dan heng's flushed face, his brow pinched. ]
You don't have to be sorry, but -
[ a deep breath, and yingxing slips a knuckle beneath dan heng's chin to tilt his head upward, looking into his eyes. ]
Your brother's going to kill me, but I - Dan Heng.. do you want help?
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Do you want help?
Dan Heng's eyes widen, and he stumbles for a moment over words that feel impossible to say, mouth forming shapes in silence for a few too-long seconds before he finally finds the right ones—
And even then, they're wrong. ]
Yes, I—I want help.. [ And his eyes close in embarrassed shame that he even needs to ask for it, but also.. ] But you don't... you don't have to make that offer just for my sake, Yingxing. That's—it's unfair to you.
[ Another pause, legs grating together as his mind works to talk himself out of what he knows his heart and body both so desperately want: ]
Besides, I... I'm not what you'd expect. So... It's okay, I'm okay...
[ But he leans into that touch, cants his head into him, breathes him in as much as he can as his own breath exhales on a shaky sigh. ]
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Unfair to me? I'm the one offering. I think that's my call, not yours.
[ if anything, he's the one being unfair to dan heng - it feels like taking advantage of him while he's vulnerable, but if he's honest, he'd much rather have dan heng's consent now rather than when he's deeper in his heat, and unable to really give it. it's important.
exhaling hard, yingxing pulls back, but only so he can press a knee into the bed and lean over dan heng, his pale hair spilling over his shoulder. as for all the rest.. ]
And - not what I'd expect? I'm not sure what you mean, but whatever it is that you're worried about I can tell you it doesn't matter. I just want to offer now instead of later.
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He wants this so much, and in his heat he needs it, but there's that small part of him wondering
that small part of him that he thinks loves
not to mention the part of him that thinks there's no way the other can be attracted to his body, and—
He sucks in a breath. The heat is making him emotional. That's all this is. It doesn't need to be like this. Logic should be enough, right? ]
Okay. [ His voice is a whisper, as thick as his breath. ] I.. accept your help.
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still, he's known dan heng long enough now to know that whatever it is he's worried about won't mean a thing, and won't get in the way of what they have. maybe it's just as simple as his vidyadhara anatomy, but that's hardly of any concern to yingxing.
nevertheless, the only way is through, so yingxing takes the initiative, dipping through the space between them to press their mouths together in a hot kiss. if he's honest, this is something that's been a long time in coming. dan heng's crush had been obvious from the beginning, and at first yingxing had enjoyed simply teasing him, enjoyed the attention from a cute young guy, but now.. now they're friends, and things have changed. his relationship with dan heng has changed. yet even still, this feels like a natural extension of what they've already built.
aeons save him from dan feng's wrath.. ]
Good. [ he murmurs against dan heng's soft lips, already intoxicated by the taste of him. ] If you need to stop, tell me immediately.
[ because his hands are already beginning to slip between the sheets and blankets and - is that one of his shirts? - to seek out dan heng's skin and push the fabric aside. ]
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Those worries will come back later, but for now—for now he's just going to let himself enjoy, going to let his body feast on this connection as much as it needs to do so.
His blink is slow, the shake of his head slower. ]
I won't need to stop, [ he breathes—though in the very next moment he feels the other's hand slipping between fabrics in search of his body, and he finds his eyes squeezing shut again, the barest thread of worry trying to worm its way between the pleasure and the need and everything else going on in the moment.
He closes his eyes and leans up, seeking another kiss. A distraction. ]
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soon enough yingxing's hands are on him, finding dan heng's skin beneath everything he's piled around himself, feeling the scorching heat of his body. his fingertips are rough from guitar-work, his palms callused from the smithing he's done - these hands hardly feel worthy of dan heng's impossibly soft skin, but he's greedy, he wants it anyway, can't resist it, especially when dan heng kisses him like he needs him to breathe.
at last, he's pushed the fabric away, and yingxing rears back and rests his weight on his knees, snagging his sleeping shirt by the hem to tug it over his head, tossing it carelessly aside. beneath it he's well build, all sleek, hard muscle strengthened by the metalwork he used to do, kept strong over time by weight lifting and working out at home. he's not as young as he once was, but yingxing is proud of how well he's maintained himself.
it's only once he's tossed his shirt aside that he looks down, and sees - dan heng, beautiful and sprawled and needy below him, distinctly minus a cock, and plus a set of soft, flushed tits.
oh. okay. right. so this is what he meant. yingxing's brow knits, but less in judgment and more in simple bewilderment - it takes him only a handful of seconds to understand what's going on here. he must be trans, but he's certainly never said anything about it to yingxing, and neither has dan feng; he passes extremely well, yingxing wouldn't have clocked him in a hundred years.
after a brief moment, his concern melts away into an easy smile, and yingxing leans over him again, chasing his mouth for another kiss. ]
You're gorgeous.
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He's half thinking about reaching up and touching him when Yingxing looks down at him instead—
anxiety rushes and gives way to panic, and yet the frown on the older man's face isn't one of judgment or anything else unkind. There's surprise, and then a handsome, warm smile, an assurance made into his mouth that he's gorgeous...
Gorgeous. The word sends a shudder of delight through him, his mouth nipping shyly at Yingxing's as it chases him, and all the worry he had chased away by relief and desire and... just so much. ]
You... You're really telling me that? [ He finally lifts his hands, lets them trail over the other's muscles, exploring the skin as he shakes his head. ] Do you know how many... how many people there are that would kill to be in my place right now? You're a sex symbol.
[ The words fall off his tongue unbidden, things he thinks he'd probably never say if he weren't half-mad with lust, but all things that are true just the same.
And, speaking of truths... ]
I've wanted you for a long time.
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[ at that, yingxing barks an easy laugh. well, he supposes that dan heng isn't necessarily wrong - he's a celebrity, one whose body has all but been on display before. yingxing isn't unaware of the sheer amount of people that lust after him. but they'd lust after dan heng, too, if they knew him, if they saw how beautiful he was, flushed pink and thighs wet with need.
speaking of his thighs - yingxing slips a knee between them, pushing upward, feeling the heat and moisture of dan heng's cunt sinking right through his thin cotton pants. ]
There's no rule that says you can't be beautiful just because a lot of people think I'm hot. [ he says pointedly, then smiles, dragging his mouth along dan heng's jaw just as he makes his confession. ] And I know you have. Here's a secret - I've wanted you, too.
[ hot kisses sweep down dan heng's throat, tasting the salt of his sweat, teeth pressing to his racing pulse, but he continues downward, over the ridge of his collarbone and down the center of his chest. ]
So just lay back, baby, let me take care of you.
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And to the rest of it, he tips his head back, fingers tangling in long white hair, breath tripping off his mouth in small gasps as Yingxing's mouth drags over his jaw, his throat, tasting the salt off his skin in a way that has the young Vidyadhara squirming under him, his cunt answering with another gush of slick that the guitarist will no doubt feel.
Yingxing has wanted him too? Aeons...
Dan Heng swallows hard, nods as he settles back into the torn cocoon of all the other's things, bathing in his scent even as he watches him with blown eyes and trembling breath. ]
Okay, [ he whispers. ] Please.
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in the back of his mind, he knows that this is dangerous. yingxing is much older than him, and despite the fact that dan heng is grown and more than of age, it still feels irresponsible. not to mention the mess of pulling dan heng into the lifestyle of a celebrity, and the very real fact that dan feng will, in fact, flay him alive if he finds out about this. he's always been very protective of his younger sibling.
but gods, in the moment, he can hardly bear the need. yingxing groans against dan heng's skin when he feels the gush of heat against his thigh, and he grinds his body down, the hot, hard press of his cock rubbing against dan heng's cunt, separated only by a few layers of cotton.
but not yet. not yet. first, yingxing allows his mouth and hands to work, his right smoothing over dan heng's hip and down, grasping his thigh, coaxing them further open, while his left dips down right where dan heng needs him most. dragging his fingers through the silken wet folds of him, yingxing easily locates the bud of his clit, rubbing it slowly while mouthing over dan heng's chest, over the small swell there, closing his mouth over a pert, pink nipple.
his head is spinning. dan heng smells so good, sounds so good, needy and desperate and clinging to him. his right hand comes up, cupping the opposite side of dan heng's chest, roughened thumb rubbing over the nub of his nipple just as two fingers slide easily into his cunt, pushing deep in one smooth motion. ]
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O-oh... fuck—
[ It's probably the first time Yingxing has ever heard him swear. Usually, his words are carefully chosen, well-spoken, but right now he's lacking control, hips arching blindly into those rolling, rubbing touches. He's so desperate, so heightened already, that he thinks he could maybe come just from this—
But he doesn't, not just yet. When he does come, it's to the sudden plunge of two fingers deep into his cunt, an unbidden moan as his head falls back to the bed, fingers of one hand clutching, tangling in long, silver-white strands. His walls clench down on that finger as a rush of slick floods them, his body tensing and loosening in mere moments. He needed that, he needed someone who wasn't him
(and that it's Yingxing only makes everything all that much better.)
His body looses, but his hips immediately start again, lifting into the other's movements, back arching for his mouth. And unlike the other, there's no worry anymore, not even at the back of his mind, not now that the gnawing hunger is finally being answered. All he wants is more— ]
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so he doesn't stop. groaning his own pleasure against the soft rise of dan heng's chest, he sucks hard at the nipple between his lips, tongue lashing against it while his fingers begin a deep, hard rhythm, fucking dan heng through the remainder of his first orgasm and toward the next, aided by the gush of fresh slick. his sheets and clothing are going to be a mess, but it's fine, it's worth it, he can change it all while dan heng recovers - then, next time, maybe they'll put some towels down. ]
Fuck, you sound so good -
[ he murmurs against wet skin, kissing his way to dan heng's opposite breast, petite and soft beneath his mouth, teeth raking over his rosy nipple. cis, trans, cock, cunt, it doesn't matter to yingxing - dan heng is achingly beautiful, so easy to fall for, and yingxing is starving for him.
so he will feast. salivating at the back of his mouth, yingxing drags himself lower, down the soft, supple expanse of dan heng's chest, over his ribs and belly, until at last he's right where he wants to be - buried between his thighs. without a moment's hesitation he gets to work, his fingers curling in dan heng's body, rubbing against his upper walls as he closes his mouth over his clit, laving it with his tongue, breathing in the dark salt of his scent. ]
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He licks his lips, remembering himself, huffing a low groan as he tries to find the words to speak; Yingxing says he sounds good, but surely the way he sounds is nothing in comparison to how wonderful the other feels, opening him up and taunting orgasm after orgasm from him.
The close of the guitarist's lips over his clit, the swipe of a tongue, have Dan Heng jerk, cry out as his hips arch towards the other's face, as his fingers tighten in long hair hard enough to tug just that little bit. It's so much that it's overwhelming, and yet at the same time he wants more of it—
and more in general, not just Yingxing's mouth but his cock, so hard before—even though he can't feel it now that the other has shifted lower—hard for him like it's some sort of dream— ]
That's—ngh—yes, please..
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he can't get enough of him. dan heng tastes incredible, the sweet salt of his nectar painting yingxing's tongue as he coaxes yet another orgasm from him, feeling the way his cunt squeezes and clamps, slick as sin all around his sopping fingers.
at last he lifts his head and licks his lips, dan heng's slick clinging to his mouth and chin, and he grins like a cat with cream, pleased with himself, pleased with the situation. pleased with dan heng. his pupils are dark and blown wide, watching dan heng with all the threatening hunger of a predator. ]
Look at you, an absolute mess for me..
[ he mutters, turning his head to kiss a hot path up dan heng's thigh. he could spend hours eating him out until his jaw went numb, but he knows that they both want more, need more, so he soon lifts himself again, climbing up dan heng's body to hover over him. he's sure he's never been so hard in his life. ]
Tell me what you need, Dan Heng. Say the words.
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"an absolute mess" is right; there's no protesting it, not even if he wanted to, the younger man groaning in answer, eyes half-lidded as he breathes around the words, lifts his wrist to his mouth, bites the skin to try to stop himself from begging for more when he's already had so much—
Except maybe Yingxing wants him to beg, the darkness in those eyes bearing down on him the same way that the other's body does, fierce and demanding. Say the words, he says, and Dan Heng bites back a whimper, drops his wrist, lifts his hand to cup the older man's cheek instead, fingers splayed over perfect skin as he breathes a shaky sigh. ]
Fuck me, [ he whispers. ] Please. I need you to fuck me.
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Anything for you, baby.
[ he whispers, turning his head to mouth hotly at dan heng's palm. aeons, he aches for him. leaning his weight on one elbow, yingxing hooks his opposite thumb into his waistband, tugging both his cotton pants and undershorts down together, just low enough for his cock to spring free, hard and hot. he's not small, and while hard he's heavy and thick, the flushed tip of his cock weeping precum liberally.
taking himself in hand, yingxing groans as he gives himself a few quick pumps, dan heng's slick still on his fingers making it all the easier. then, angling his hips, he drags the head of his cock between the folds of dan heng's eager, clenching cunt, so ready for him, so greedy for him.
he wants to fuck him deep and hard, but not everyone is accustomed to his size, so yingxing moves slowly, pushing his hips forward until the head pops in, before slowly, carefully guiding himself halfway in. the pleasure is immediate, a hot burst in his belly, and yingxing's breath catches roughly, abdomen tensing. ]
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And then the older man tugs his clothing just low enough for his cock to be freed, and Dan Heng decides it's that. He's big in the way a dominant male would be big—but Yingxing is human, and such things are rare—thick and so heavy with seed that both his mouth and his cunt drool with the possibility.
He writhes under the other man at the movement of his hips, the slow drag over his folds right before Yingxing starts to press into him; his eyes roll back in his head as the head breeches him, as the rest of him starts to press: slow, careful, leaving him writhing and groaning even as the other's breath catches above him.
And he knows, he knows that Yingxing is being slow for his sake, not wanting to hurt him, but Dan Heng is wetter than he's ever been, needier than he's ever been, and he's going to explode if he doesn't have him sooner rather than later, so— ]
I can take it.
[ His voice is low, rough, the fingers in Yingxing's hair tugging just enough to draw the other's attention to him. ]
I've needed this all day. I can take it.
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for a moment his eyes roll back, and yingxing groans low and deep. it's been awhile since he'd last had a partner, and the fact that he's wanted to get dan heng spread beneath him in his bed for a long while now certainly doesn't help. he could have seduced him much earlier he knows, dan heng likely would have given in, but yingxing had held back - had tried to, at least, given their disparate ages. now that's all shattered, and he's going to have to deal with the fallout, but that's just about the last thing on his mind right now, when he's got his swelling knot pressed up against dan heng's sweet, willing entrance.
at last he folds downward, his hips nestled between dan heng's spread thighs, pressing their bodies together and seeking his mouth in another hot kiss, allowing dan heng to enjoy the lingering taste of his cunt on yingxing's lips and tongue. both hands grops down dan heng's sides, seizing his hips and holding as he begins to move, drawing his hips back and fucking into him deeply. ]
Fuck, you feel so good..
[ he whispers harshly, licking into dan heng's mouth as their bodies slide together, his thumbs pressing into the dips of dan heng's hips. ]
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Yes—
[ It's a low affirmation of his pleasure right before Yingxing's mouth seizes his, the taste of salt and sweat and something sweeter on his tongue, and Dan Heng finds himself doing something he had never imagined doing before, licking the taste of his own cunt off Yingxing's mouth as he answers the other's kiss. His own arms circle the older man's shoulders as he arches up, crying out a little too loud at the sensation of the other's cock pistoning into him. So hard, so deep—so big that if Dan Heng didn't know better, he'd wonder if he were dealing with the beginnings of a knot. ]
So do you— [ He gasps it against the older man's mouth, fingers scrabbling against his back as his hips arch up into the movements. He's three orgasms in, but at this rate, he won't last long at all— ]
Don't stop, even when I come—
[ A low, small-voiced plea as he groans, holds the other man tighter as his hips rock up, needy and insistent. ]
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don't stop, even when i come.
that's just about the most erotic thing that yingxing has heard in a long time, and it's enough to make his cock twitch in dan heng's hold, his heart hammering. groaning low against his mouth, he catches dan heng's lower lip between his teeth, tugging. ]
I won't.
[ he'll fuck him as hard and fast and deep as he needs, as often as he wants. though his status as an alpha is often surprising to people, it means his refractory period is incredibly low, which is certainly convenient for his partners. he can satisfy dan heng as much as he needs, until he's completely exhausted.
so he keeps at it, fucking into him hard and fast, skin slapping skin, the mattress creaking as he slams dan heng down into it with every thrust. his elbows press into the bedding at either side of dan heng's neck, his head lowering to press hot kisses to his throat, sucking at his pulse, sweat already gathering on his skin. ]
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His hands scrabble helplessly against Yingxing's muscled shoulders before locking into his hair, holding tight enough to pull. His hips arch up, hard, fighting the downwards push if only to bring them still closer together. And his head cants, arches back, giving the other man as much room as he wants to suck kisses into his pulse point.
(And is it wrong to hope he'll leave marks? With the collars he tends to wear, no one would see, but he would know...)
Like this though it doesn't take long before another orgasm seizes him, body tensing under Yingxing's for a moment, slick gushing out around his cock, Dan Heng gasping helplessly for breath. He's immediately overwhelmed by the sensations, sinking bonelessly back into the older man's bed as the mattress creaks under Yingxing's hard movements. ]
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and yingxing won't stop, he'll exhaust the boy until he has nothing more to give, until his heat has ravaged his body and he's given everything he possibly can.
that first orgasm nearly knocks the breath from him. the way dan heng's cunt locks around his cock is almost painful, sinfully tight, and yingxing thrusts in hard, holding still for a moment so that dan heng might feel the full length of him inside of him, his straining knot pushed up hard against him.
but he can't stay still for long. before dan heng has even recovered, yingxing is fucking into him again, hard and fast, both hands seizing at his thighs to tug them up against his hips, coaxing him to wrap around his waist as his teeth and lips bruise that supple throat, nearly breaking skin. ]
So good for me, baby - [ he whispers harshly, through the loud slap of their bodies, and the slamming of the headboard. ] So wet, you feel so good -
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There's that moment when he comes that Yingxing pauses, deep inside him—and then he starts moving again and Dan Heng cries out again, a wild sound, a sound made of want and desperation alike, somehow drowning out the slap of their bodies and making it quiet. He's never this loud, ever, but now...
(Aeons, he's going mad, it really feels like there's a knot straining against him—)
He's left to shake and tremble under the wake of the other's movements, overwhelmed for those few moments despite getting exactly what he asked for, being fucked through his orgasm even as the motions make his head spin and his cunt clench in confused desire, his nerve endings alight with the sensation of too much but not enough. But then his body starts to settle down, the thrum of pleasure quickly attuning to the needs of his heat. Dan Heng is mindless but everything he's given, he needs.
Mindless enough that his lips form the shapes of words he wants to say, words he would never usually let himself say, words that fall from his breath, hot and aching like the rest of him: ]
Bite me—
[ Later, he'll be mortified. But for now, he's just listening, answering the needs of his body, asking for what it is he desires. ]
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who is yingxing to deny him?
opening his mouth wide, yingxing sinks in his teeth, scraping them over dan heng's pulse and down, a bruise blooming dark beneath his delicate skin. and then, clamping down, he uses dan heng as an anchor as he fucks him silly, pounding into him relentlessly, chasing his own pleasure now that dan heng has enjoyed no less than three orgasms at his hand. he's not sure he could hold off too much longer anyway - or, well, not sure that he wants to. his stamina is great enough that yingxing could drag this out if he wanted, but the desire to fill this beautiful boy up is too strong, the urge to breed him viciously clinging.
so he lets go. he allows the bliss to take over.
with a deep, feral moan against dan heng's throat, yingxing comes hard, snapping his hips faster and faster, his knot catching on dan heng's rim several times before it finally pops inside, plugging him up thoroughly as he spills in thick, heavy ropes of sticky hot spend. coating dan heng's walls, filling his waiting womb, yinxging's cock pulses within him, filling him over and over with an inordinate amount, and if not for his knot it would easily spill free, a mess all over the sheets. ]
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But it's a knot he gets, the sudden extra burst of fullness making him see stars. He comes hard in time with the older man, flooding slick even as his cunt is filled, filled, filled
(oh, he can't breathe for it)
and he sinks dazedly into the sweat-covered sheets and clothes that surround them, glowing eyes hazed over with bliss. There's a slight pressure at his abdomen, a visible hint of a bulge there as he starts lies back, panting helplessly into the space between them, the scent of him—of them—that fills the room. His heat rumbles in contented pleasure, happy to rest for a little while—so much better than the orgasms he gave himself in the bath before— ]
You're an Alpha— [ The words are slurred, hanging heavy on his tongue. ] I never—you're a human, so...
[ It seems that each of them had their own secrets after all. ]
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but he's not worried about that. he's not worried about anything right now, besides the hot pulse of dan heng's cunt all around him, still rhythmically massaging the length of his cock from knot to tip in a way that makes him feel dizzy and satisfied. panting into dan heng's shoulder, he is only barely able to hold himself up over him, muscles straining, but he doesn't want to let his weight collapse onto dan heng.
so instead, after catching his breath, he rolls onto his side, an arm hooked around dan heng's waist to pull him with him, keeping their bodies locked comfortably together. ]
.. yeah.
[ he says quietly, his voice rough, a little raw, thumb rubbing slow circles into the small of dan heng's back. ]
Not something I talk about often. Sorry, I should have warned you.
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There are things I could have told you, too, but didn't.
[ His voice is quiet, still almost slurred together with his content. The usual shame and disgust he feels around the topic seems distant, even to him. One of his normal small smiles finds his lips, although his one is more content, lazier, than the others have ever been. ]
Besides, it was a nice surprise. [ A thoughtful pause as he shakes his head. ] No, that's not right. It was better than nice. It... mm. I can't think of the word right now, but it was that.
[ He shakes his head again, a hint of color in his cheeks. Embarrassment. ]
I think I've gone stupid.
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You have, and it's cute.
[ he murmurs, eyes fond as he looks into dan heng's face while the two of them rest, still catching their breath, hearts pounding. their skin sticks together, dewy with sweat, yingxing's hair half fallen from its pin and sticking to his neck and shoulders. ]
You could do with being stupid more often, I think.
[ yingxing's grin is syrupy, gentle, his free arm curling beneath his head to act as a pillow. ]
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You're just saying that as an excuse to do this more often.
[ Not that he's complaining. He reaches up, brushing back the hair sticking to Yingxing's skin, and the smallest of frowns finds his expression, lips part in a silent thought—and close again for a moment as he processes, decides.
After a moment, he says, his voice quiet: ]
My heat is going to get worse over the next day or so, I think. So I... before it does, I should tell you. While I can.
[ Oh, he's bad at this. ]
March bought the wristband for me because I wanted it. It had nothing to do with her. I... I have wanted this for a long time now.
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I know.
[ he says gently, his eyes glinting with mischief, but mostly fondness. ]
It was pretty obvious, hm?
[ at least it was to yingxing. but he's dealt with enough fans with enormous crushes to know what it looks like, even when people try to hide it. lifting his hand, he rests a knuckle beneath dan heng's chin, the pad of his thumb smoothing along the line of his jaw. ]
But I like it. I like you.
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He relaxes into that touch, even as he continues to smooth the older man's hair away from his face. ]
Okay. I. That's good.
[ Internally, he pulls a face at how awkward he sounds, but there's nothing he can do about it now. ]
I just wanted to make sure you knew first, because... this is my first heat— [ he doesn't really remember confessing it to the other earlier when he was out of his mind ] —but everything I've read says that they get worse before they get better.
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Mm. Well, it'll probably be tempered a little bit by the fact that you've got me. Trying to go through it alone would've probably driven you insane, so.. I'm glad you're here.
[ his arm slings back around dan heng's waist, keeping him scooped close despite how overheated he feels. this afterglow is sweet, and he'd like to bask in it for as long as he can. ]
Too bad I couldn't have taken you on a date first, but.. I'll make it up to you, hmm?
[ maybe they're doing things a little out of order, but that's all right. they'll make it work. ]
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He relaxes into Yingxing's arms, lets himself just be. ]
I'm glad I'm here too.
[ A wild, blind decision made in the insanity of heat sickness—he doesn't know why it was here he chose, but he's glad it was. When Yingxing's arm slips around his waist, he uses the opportunity to curl himself in closer, taking in a breath of the other's scent, sweat-drenched and softened by his own sex. ]
A date might have been difficult anyway, what with who you are, and who I am, and..
[ He falls silent for a moment, attention drifting to where he can still feel the other's knot locked tight inside him, keeping him so pleasantly, blissfully full, the sensation soured only by that same discomfort that settles within him every time he looks in a mirror. ]
My body. It doesn't bother you?
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and then dan heng begins to talk, to say things that have yingxing's brow tightening with concern. ]
No, it doesn't. Why should it?
[ he doesn't know dan heng's particular struggle, can't relate to it personally, but he's had trans friends, he knows how difficult it can be, how the dysphoria can threaten to eat you alive. he doesn't envy him. it's not the same thing, but he can understand, to a degree, what it feels like to not like who you see in the mirror. ]
You're gorgeous, like this, or with your other look - it doesn't matter to me.
[ and he's not going to complain about good pussy, ever. ]
I guess that's another reason you wear that disguise?
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To the question: ]
Right. I bind my chest anyway, but at first, it was just easier to change a lot of things at once. It was draining, but it helped me remember not to let the magic slip. Nowadays, it's almost like second nature. Most of the time, at least.
[ He doesn't bother mentioning the fact that it's long since slipped off, the heat making it too hard to maintain his focus. It's obvious to both of them anyway.
He does, however, stifle a yawn. With the other's knot still filling him and his body temporarily soothed, sleep is starting to coil itself around him again, his body craving rest that he doesn't quite want to take just yet. ]
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Whatever you need to do to feel comfortable in your body is what you need to do. Doesn't matter what I or anyone else thinks. Okay? You just be you.
[ his cute, perfect little self, all snuggled up in yingxing's arms. smiling into dan heng's hair, he takes in a deep, satisfying breath, closing his eyes and keeping him scooped in close. his knot is slowly beginning to go down, but it'll take some time, and they'll likely be asleep by the time it happens. cleanup can happen in the morning, then.
with a soft hum, yingxing presses a kiss to the crown of dan heng's head. ]
Get some rest.
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He has to be careful, doesn't he? Because he could fall in love with this man.
Still, he finds himself smiling as he curls in closer, allows himself to start to drift into that sleep, permission given by the other despite his initial attempt to stay awake. Quickly, sleep takes him, lulls him into its comforting embrace, and all those thoughts, worried and content and otherwise, are gone.
For someone as exhausted as he is, he wakes sooner than he should, a whole new pleasure aching under his skin. The sheets and clothes piled around them are wet, either from the fresh sweat lining his skin or the combination of their fluids that have seeped out from him now that Yingxing is no longer hard. The other is still pressed deep into him though, wrapped up close against him, deep in his own sleep, and—
Maybe he doesn't even have to wake him.
It's barely a thought that processes in his mind before his hips start to move, dragging himself against Yingxing, only half-awake himself but driven by the same need that has stirred in him since yesterday. And with the other wrapped around him, the answer is so obvious, so easy— ]
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gods. dan feng is going to eviscerate him when he finds out. and he will find out, sooner or later.
but yingxing will worry about that later, after this week is over and dan heng decides what exactly it is that he wants from him. from them. for now, he too soon drifts off, growing still as he falls back into a deep sleep.
it's not quite morning yet when dan heng stirs again, though yingxing does not - does not even wake when dan heng begins to move, sliding against him, needy and wanting. his body, however, responds appropriately, a low hum in the back of his throat as his cock twitches and stirs, beginning to fill out inside of him. it can't be helped, dan heng's cunt is perfect, warm and wet and hugging all around him..
ah, his dreams are, perhaps, growing a little more colorful. ]
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He's not really thinking though, not past the animalistic need of the thing, his heat continuing to drive him, push him to do things he wouldn't normally, would never have imagined doing, really.
And so the steady filling out of Yingxing's cock is met with a low groan into the older man's throat, an achy throb of his cunt at the thought of being tied to him with that knot once more, a mutter of a mindless apology into his skin as his hips continue to grind into the other, as Dan Heng starts to see those stars of pleasure all over again. ]
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so when he finally does begin to wake, his eyelids fluttering before they slowly open, he only grins. the sky is still mostly dark outside the warehouse windows, but the artificial sun is just barely beginning to peek above the horizon, staining it a soft molten gold, lighting the room in a faint, warm glow. yingxing hums, shifting against the damp fabric they're piled on, and rolls his hips, pushing in deep, his cock still slowly hardening, filling dan heng up. ]
.. g'morning.
[ he murmurs, dipping to mouth along dan heng's jawline, pressing lazy kisses there while the young man ruts against him, fucking himself on yingxing's growing erection.
and then, hooking his arm around dan heng's slim waist, yingxing rolls onto his back, pulling dan heng over him. ]
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Good morning, [ he whispers back. And then, because he has enough presence of mind at least to apologize: ] I'm sorry, I woke up and I needed...
[ Before he can finish the sentence, though, they're rolled, Yingxing on his back and Dan Heng straddled across him, half-sitting in his lap due to the way he's been moving. And usually, here, he would hesitate, the shyness would claim him—even now, it tries to, red climbing his cheeks as he looks down at the other's grinning face—but in this moment he needs enough that the embarrassment is put aside, that his only answer is to continue moving his hips, rolling them down against that steadily-hardening cock.
He breathes out a low groan, eyes closing as his head tips back, hands bracing on that powerful chest. ]
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[ consent and all - it's important to him, too, but in this case, he's more than fine with a little bit of somno, with dan heng using him like a toy even while he's still asleep. surely it's hard for him to resist, while he's deep in his heat.
more important is how cute dan heng looks when he's being shy and embarrassed. maybe it's asking a lot of him, to give him the opportunity to take charge a little, but yingxing can't help it either - he wants to see what dan heng looks like when he's chasing his own pleasure just how he wants it. if it helps to bolster his confidence in the same stroke, well, all the better. ]
Mmn.. still so wet for me.
[ he murmurs, settling his hands onto dan heng's hips, his chest tensing beneath the press of those soft hands, muscle jumping. his abdomen flexes as he rolls his hips upward, pushing deep into dan heng again, his cock now full and thick, flushed and eager. ]
And still so full of my cum, too. Good boy, keeping so much in..
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He shakes his head just a little. ]
The sheets... the bedding, it's... all really wet, [ he manages, and there's something of an apology in his tone. More than he could have imagined, he likes the way the other calls him a good boy, but right now he feels that the praise is undeserved, that he needs to be filled up again so he can do it better—
(Or is that just the heat, driving him mad with the desire to be filled again?)
He huffs out a sigh as his hips move harder down against the other's cock. ]
I can... I can do better.
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Oh? Mm.. are you going to show me?
[ he murmurs, squeezing the swell of dan heng's hips, rubbing his thumbs over his hipbones and down through the hollows, then up again. then one hand slips free, sliding around dan heng's thigh to squeeze as his ass, before teasing at the base of his tail, rubbing the soft scales along the underside where it meets his skin. ]
Going to show me how much you can take? You're still so full..
[ even despite how much has leaked free, how much is still leaking free with every thrust of their bodies together, yingxing can still feel plenty inside, can still see the very slight swell of dan heng's lower belly, so full of his spend. ]
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But—
He can do better. He can be fuller. Suddenly, the idea of showing off, of pleasing Yingxing even more, is incredibly appealing.
So he nods, hips moving that little bit faster against him as he does, glowing eyes alight with arousal and determination both. ]
I can—I.. I'm gonna show you, yeah.
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Good boy.. you'll do well for me, I know.
[ he murmurs, praising him, seeing all too easily how it seems to please dan heng, and yingxing wants him pleased. ]
Keep going for me then, baby, show me how much you love riding my cock.
[ breathless, yingxing lifts his hips, pushing in deep enough that dan heng will be able to feel the beginnings of his knot swelling, both hands now grabbing at his ass, squeezing the supple flesh. he keeps his hips canted upward as much as he can, giving dan heng something good to ride. ]
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He can feel the beginnings of the knot just like Yingxing wants him to, and it only makes him groan and toss his head back, redoubling his efforts, using the other's angle to ride down against him as well as he can, his hips lifting and falling in needy desperation.
Truthfully, he's not sure he'll last much longer, and it's probably evident in the way his movements start to falter a little, a low groan on his lips that slowly becomes a whine, breath stuttering as he moves. ]
Ngh, fuck...
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[ he whispers, voice rough and rasping, and yingxing groans, pushing his shoulders back against the bedding, the drag of dan heng's nails scratching at his chest leaving a pleasant burn behind. abdomen tensing, he redoubles his grip on his ass, holding him still so he can fuck up into him harder and faster, the sound of their bodies coming together wet and obscene. ]
Just like that..
[ clenching his jaw, yingxing's thumbs press hard into dan heng's hips, sweat now gleaming on his skin, core muscles burning. aeons, it's so damned good, dan heng is so wet, so tight, squeezing him like a fist, his heart slamming against his ribs. ]
Come for me now, sweetheart, I know you're close.
[ and the more orgasms he can fuck out of dan heng, the better. ]
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But he keeps moving for as long as he can, hips moving hard and fast. He's close, and Yingxing calls for him, rough voiced but gentle, voice echoing in his mind over the sound of their bodies coming together in wanton pleasure— ]
Fuck—
[ From where the other lays back, he'll get a grand view of the gush of slick from Dan Heng's cunt as the younger man orgasms, head tossed back and hips still moving instinctively even as his muscles clench down. ]
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before dan heng has had the chance to recover, or even finish his orgasm, yingxing tenses and flips them again, surging forward to press dan heng into the rumpled bedding right onto his back. ]
You're so perfect -
[ he murmurs, burying his face in dan heng's neck as he continues pistoning into him, fucking him through the crest of his orgasm and after, his knot swelling further, pushing against him but not yet popping in. he isn't ready to give in just yet. ]
Give me another one, Ah Heng..
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It has him reaching, fingers gripping now in the other's hair, the sound of his voice a keening whine as he rolls his hips up, up against the movements, right into those same overwhelming sensations.
Like this, with his body screaming in exhaustion and pleasure at the same time, with Yingxing's low voice pushing him onward, it's no surprise that he comes again sooner rather than later, his cry almost a sob of pleasure as he does, slumping back against the pillow, limbs trembling with exertion. ]
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but he holds off just a little longer. ]
Good boy.. [ he whispers, kissing his way back to dan heng's mouth, murmuring against his swollen lips. ] .. do you need me to fill you up, hmm?
[ he doesn't stop fucking him, even while he talks, both hands seizing dan heng's thighs and pushing them further open, hooking his elbows beneath his knees to spread him, allowing dan heng to feel every inch of him sinking in deep. ]
Tell me how much you need it, baby, how you need me to breed you so good, and fill your belly up..
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And—speaking of craving—
His head slumps further back in response to the other's movements, the way he's shifted and spread open on the bed, and his lips tremble against Yingxing's mouth, the answer coming to him faster than he could have imagined it would—the willingness, too, to speak such words, driven by the need still aching, burning— ]
I need it, Yingxing, I—fuck, I need you so much, please... please don't make me wait anymore, fucking... fill me up, make me yours. Ruin—ruin me for anyone else. Breed me—
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Mm, just like that..
[ what a good boy he's being, begging for what he needs like that - yingxing is more than happy to give it to him.
with a deep grunt, his hips snap forward once, twice, three times, hard and erratic, until at last his knot pushes through and he comes hard enough to see stars, moaning against dan heng's lips. painting his insides with ropes of hot spend, yingxing works his hips shallowly, his knot tugging at dan heng's abused entrance but staying firmly inside while he spills, flooding his belly once more with exactly what he needs. what they both need. ]
Fuck -
[ he whispers harshly, trembling as he holds himself up, eyes squeezed shut to better take in the pleasure. ]
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Oh, fuck...
[ It's a helpless little echo, and Dan Heng's fingers reach, cupping at Yingxing's cheek and pulling him in closer, mouth pressing soft and insistent against the elder's.
He hasn't really thought about what he said, or the implications, and right now there's no room in his mind for it anyway. Everything is just afterglow and bliss. ]
Ngh.. that was perfect...
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gods, dan heng is just too much. he makes yingxing feel crazy and reckless. makes him think with his dick and not with his brain. ]
Mm.. yeah, it was.
[ he answers, breathless, his voice gone husky and rough. carefully, he allows himself to sink down, resting against one elbow, their skin sticking together, hair mussed and matted. the bedding is even more of a mess now, but that'll be a problem for them in ten minutes or so. not right now. ]
You're incredible.
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[ He smiles up at the other, continuing to brush his hair back, the smile on his lips awkward with shyness. ]
I'm really glad I came here. When I realized what I was done, I was scared that I'd made a mistake, but... I made the right choice. You've been so good to me, and I can't.. there's no way to... well, I'm grateful.
[ He moves to nestle against the other a little more, breath stuttering as he moves against the knot. ]
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[ yingxing huffs a laugh, abashed, glancing aside. sure, he gets compliments all the time, but that's from fans, from people who know blade and ren, not yingxing, and while he definitely has arrogant moments, and he's more than self-assured, hearing something like that from dan heng makes him feel almost shy.
almost. he's still a grown man, not a schoolboy, so it isn't long before he's looking back to him again, his eyes crinkling with fondness. ]
I'm not giving you anything less than what you deserve. Give yourself a little more credit. You're smart, you're loyal, kind, beautiful.. what more could anyone want, right?
[ he hums, pressing another kiss to dan heng's mouth, then another. ]
Believe me, you're worth it.
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I... I like hearing you talk like that, [ he admits after a moment. ] When you say nice things. And call me baby. And "good boy".
[ Okay, his cheeks are pretty close to red now. He presses his face into Yingxing's shoulder with a soft, barked laugh. ]
I'm going to shut up now.
[ But, shutting up or not, he's been honest, and he thinks that's important, especially as Yingxing is speaking so freely with him. He's embarrassed, but he feels good, too. ]
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[ he murmurs softly, through an easy grin, as he turns his head to nuzzle against dan heng's tapered ear and the corner of his jaw. he smells like sweat and sin, a heady scent that yingxing could easily get drunk on. ]
Those are things I want to know.
[ pet names and dirty talk come easily to him, but if dan heng wasn't into it, that's something he'd rather know now than later. granted, dan heng's body and moans told him all he needed to know about how he felt, but even still, having verbal affirmation is always helpful. rumbling from deep in his chest, yingxing once more finally rolls them carefully onto their sides, before his shoulders give out and he collapses his weight on the poor boy. ]
I'll tell you a secret, too. Listening to you while you were in the bath earlier.. it drove me crazy.
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(Fuck, he's so full—)
He's about to ask a question, the content of which is immediately forgotten when Yingxing keeps talking, offers a secret which makes Dan Heng's cheeks burn, glowing eyes wide as the look up at him in shock. ]
I—you—ugh, I didn't know you heard, I tried to... be quiet..
[ But all he can think right now is what Yingxing looked like, going about his night while listening to him up here... despite himself, his cunt gives a curious little flutter, a thread of pleasure running down his spine. ]
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I know you did, but you weren't quite quiet enough.
[ he pushes dan heng's damp fringe from his eyes, thumb coasting along the ridge of his cheekbone, his eyes soft and heavily lidded. ]
I tried not to listen. Tried not to think about you in there, but..
[ it was all but impossible. yingxing's thumb trails lower down his cheek, and over the pink swell of dan heng's lips. ]
It took all I had not to burst in there and take you right there.
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I would have welcomed you, [ he admits, his voice low. ] I mean... I would have been... mortified, but I...
[ He's not really thinking as his lips part, take the tip of the other's thumb between them for a quick, teasing lick. ]
I was thinking about you in there anyway.
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[ yingxing's smile curls, and he chuckles from deep in his throat, one hand smoothing down dan heng's spine to rub slow circles into the base of his tail. ]
You flatter me. Would you tell me what you were thinking about?
[ gods, the way dan heng's cunt squeezes all around him again, pulsing with arousal at the very idea of what they're discussing.. it makes yingxing's cock twitch inside of him, spilling another small burst of spend inside of him. he groans softly, nudging at dan heng's jaw with his nose, his hips giving a shallow rock forward. ]
Thinking about my fingers inside of you instead of yours?
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[ He barely finishes his statement when he feels the twitch of Yingxing's cock, a small burst of his seed adding to the mess he's already made of Dan Heng, and the younger man can't help but groan in reply at the shallow rock of his hips, cunt squeezing all over again around him. He can't help but flicker his eyes to the way his belly bulges with the other, wondering if he could take still more—
But he tears his eyes back up to Yingxing, swallows hard as he nods, admits the truth of it even as his cheeks continue to burn. ]
I was. I knew... I knew it would feel so much better if it were you...
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[ he knows the answer, he's just being a shit about it. he wants to hear it. wants to know it. but then dan heng's body is clamping and fluttering all around him again, and yingxing groans under his breath, the hand at dan heng's tail sliding down to grab a handful of his ass, squeezing. ]
Baby, you're gonna make me crazy -
[ he murmurs, kissing slowly along the line of dan heng's pulse, tasting the salt of his sweat. ]
Gonna make me hard again before I can even pull out.
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[ And he'd say more, perhaps, but Yingxing is groaning, squeezing at his ass, telling him he's making him crazy, when as far as Dan Heng is concerned, it's the older man who started them down this line of conversation in the first place.
And yet, he can't help but answer by rolling his hips up into the other's, by deliberately squeezing his walls down against the other's slowly-shrinking knot as he turns his head, catches Yingxing's mouth with his own. ]
Mm...
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yingxing's free hand slips into dan heng's hair, cupping the base of his skull to keep him close while they kiss, while they slide their bodies together, smooth and sensuous. yingxing licks into his mouth, exploring him, tasting him, enjoying the texture of his tongue, soft and warm along his own. ]
Mm.. you're a good kisser.
[ he murmurs against dan heng's mouth, then kisses him again, then again, soft and slow. ]
Feels nice..
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He's a good kisser, according to the other, and that—well, he hasn't really had that much experience, so he can hardly complain, can he? He hums in pleasure, cheeks warm as his body shifts against Yingxing's in a slow grind, even as he answers the kisses with his own. ]
Mm... me too.
[ He sighs in content, legs winding around the other a little more closely as he continues rolling into him, kissing slow and soft the whole time. ]
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there's something incredibly erotic about that, about the idea that they could remain tied together for hours, fucking like teenagers, one orgasm after the other until dan heng is fit to burst.
he feels those slim legs coil around him, and yingxing begins to move in earnest, his knot down enough by now that he can fuck into him properly, cock sliding in deep before smoothing out again, a mess of dan heng's slick and his own spend gushing noisily with every slow, careful thrust.
there's no rush this time. no ferocious need that consumes them both. it's more like making love, their hands all over each other, his mouth full of dan heng's taste, their kiss unbroken. kneading dan heng's supple ass, he slides his palm down the outside of his lover's thigh to his knee, grasping, squeezing, before retracing his path back down, cupping his behind to pull their hips together. ]
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He groans softly, rolling himself down against the guitarist's thrusts, and despite the low coil of heat still in his belly, this time feels different to him too: gentler, less desperate, something for the two of them, rather than the needs of his body.
As awful as parts of it have felt so far, Dan Heng doesn't think he wants his heat to end, if it means staying here like this.
(But that's a pipe dream, isn't it? Yingxing has places to be, and so does he—) ]
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gods, it feels so good. dan heng is still so tight all around him despite how well fucked he is, wet with both his own natural lubrication and the copious amount of spend that yingxing has filled him with, and it feels positively exquisite. warm pleasure coils in his lower abdomen, spreading throughout his body, and soon enough they have fallen into a smooth, gentle pace together, their hips rolling and meeting in tandem, building a sinewy rhythm that feels natural and pleasurable. ]
Dan Heng..
[ he murmurs the name, snagging dan heng's lower lip between his teeth and tugging gently before returning to those slow, molten kisses, lapping at his mouth as his cock pushes deep, his thighs wet with the mess they're making. it's a slow buildup, unhurried and sweet, the hand in dan heng's hair massaging his nape, while the other continues to hold his ass, guiding his hips to move in sync with his own. ]
Gods, baby, I can't stand how good you feel..
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(He wonders, too, how sensitive his cock would be to touch, or even to his mouth—The shudder that passes through him at that brief thought is visceral, and he groans.)
Even with that image in his mind, though, it's easy to fall into a steady pace, hips moving against Yingxing's as each of those thrusts presses deep within him, spilling some of their shared fluids in anticipation of more, body moving against body in smooth, unhurried bliss.
He answers the low call of his name with a sigh, the admission of pleasure with a deliberate grind of his hips, his breath trembling on his mouth as he does. ]
You—you too, Yingxing. You feel so good in me...
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Good, I want to make you feel good..
[ he says, while his hand slides under dan heng's knee again, lifting it gently so he can hook his elbow beneath it, spreading dan heng open a little further, his cock sinking in deep. ]
I want to make you squirm and moan and beg.
[ his cock aches, squeezed by dan heng's needy cunt as he slides in rhythmically, the pace picking up a little, though still maintaining its easiness, its natural rhythm, and its depth, each forward thrust pushing in far enough to fill him entirely. ]
I want to make you come for me until you can barely move..
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You're ridiculous— [ he argues, even as his words catch on a sudden moan, head tipping back a little as Yingxing's cock presses even deeper into him, as the older man starts picking up his pace. ] I already.. you've already made me feel so good.
[ Not to mention how much time he's already spent squirming under Yingxing, moaning for him. He doesn't think he's done a whole lot of begging yet, but even then, as for the rest... ]
Do you realize that I've already lost count of how many orgasms I've had since I've arrived here?
[ Although even with that said, something about the way the other talks about him not being able to move... it's hot. Really, really hot. ]
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Good. I hope you keep losing track.
[ they're surely never going to leave the bed, at this rate. not when dan heng feels so fucking good, a slick, velvet sleeve around his cock that yingxing could pump into for days on end. ]
Maybe I've already made you feel good, but that doesn't mean I don't want more.
[ if dan heng thinks he's exaggerating about yingxing wanting to fuck him until he can't walk, he's surely wrong. there's nothing more that he wants. kissing down dan heng's throat, yingxing hums low in his chest, dragging his tongue over his racing pulse. they've been taking their time, and he could drag this on even longer if he wanted, between his natural stamina and the fact that he's already come multiple times, but.. they should probably clean up eventually. and dan heng is going to need food and hydration.
so yingxing reaches down, releasing dan heng's knee to smooth that hand instead over the soft swell of his full belly, then further, rubbing at his clit with the pads of two fingers. ]
Gonne come for me soon, baby?
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...is it weird to think that there's something special about this?
Is it just wishful thinking?
And it's strange, but Dan Heng, who doubts himself on so many other things, doesn't think so.
He groans lowly, arching up against Yingxing as the other's hand smooths over his belly, as his fingers dip to start stroking over his clit. ]
I... mngh, fuck... y-yeah, if you keep doing that...
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.. but that doesn't make this feel any less special. he likes dan heng, likes him a lot, they've grown close despite his status as a celebrity, and the attraction they have toward one another is genuine, even if dan heng's began as a crush on a rock star. there's something here between them, something beyond just sex that yingxing would like to explore, but.. well, they can discuss it after dan heng's heat has passed, and he's fully back in his right mind.
for now, yingxing keeps fucking into him, deep and slow, while the pads of his middle and ring fingers move in circles over dan heng's clit, teasing the sensitive underside to make him arch and squirm. ]
Be a good boy for me, then.. [ he murmurs, kissing his mouth again, their breath mingling. ] .. let me feel that pretty cunt squeeze me up as you come.
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He gasps out his pleasure, his fingers curling tight into the other's skin, holding himself steady as he falls into that pleasure, an orgasm not as physically intense as the others, and yet somehow still moreso, in ways he can't explain. His walls clench, and he chases Yingxing's mouth for kiss after kiss after kiss, until he's breathless, his whole body trembling with the sensation.
The others were good. Amazing, even. And yet somehow, still nothing like this. He's dizzy with the pleasure as he comes down, mouth moving against Yingxing's in a silent plea, something rough and ragged, a plea to be filled up again— ]
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it feels so incredibly good, yingxing doesn't bother to draw it out. with one last push of his hips he comes as well, cock pulsing as he fills dan heng yet again. a normal man might not have much left to give, but for better or for worse, yingxing is an alpha, so he's able to provide dan heng with just as much hot, sticky spend as he had initially, flooding his cunt and womb both.
the only difference being that this time, he doesn't push his knot inside - much as he might like to. if they stay locked together too long again this time, they'll probably end up in this same situation all over again, and never get out of bed. which is great, but dan heng needs water and energy.
with a soft, satisfied sigh, yingxing sinks his teeth against dan heng's lower lip, still gently teasing his clit to make him tighten and twitch, riding out the last waves of their shared orgasm. ]
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(It's probably for the best that he isn't knotted, really, even as he complains about it.) ]
So good... [ His words are heavy and slurred, broken by a rough groan at the sensation of Yingxing's fingers continuing to roll gently over him. ] Feels so good...
[ And then he returns the bite, perhaps a little too hard—perhaps scolding, just a bit. ]
I wanted your knot, though.
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[ yingxing can't help the way he laughs, even as dan heng bites his lip, one hand pulling back to slap him on the ass. ]
I know you did, but if I gave it to you we'd end up in this situation all over again.
[ they can barely keep their hands off of each other, especially with dan heng's heat acting up. how can they possibly stop themselves from starting again if they remain tied together for the next twenty minutes? ]
Which is great and all, but you need food and water, and we should probably wash up.
[ and change the bedding.. he'll need to put down some towels. ]
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Apparently not, from the response the other gives, the laugh on his lips as he reminds Dan Heng that he needs food and water—and that they need to wash up.
(And... is it wrong that he likes all too much the idea of perhaps taking a shower or bath with the other?) ]
Mm... you're right.
[ Is there an edge of something sulky to his voice? Maybe, though he'd deny it even if the other man asked. Instead, he puts a hand to his swollen belly. ]
You realize that me moving anywhere is going to create a terrible mess, right?
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Mm, well, that's kind of an inevitability..
[ dan heng is stuffed absolutely full to the brim. maybe yingxing went a little overboard.. well, it's too late for them to worry about that now, and besides, if he hadn't come inside of him, dan heng would have probably pouted and given him a hard time about it. greedy boy.
yingxing hums, then carefully eases his hips back, pulling his mostly softened cock free of dan heng for the first time since they first fell together hours ago. there's an immediate, messy gush, and yingxing grins. ]
Went a little overboard, maybe.
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Just a little, [ he agrees, and his elbows fold under his body so that he can prop himself up, looking at the mess—
and only in that moment realizing just how many of Yingxing's clothes he stole the night before. His lips part in an apology, and then—
Oh. No.
No, there's something much more important and concerning than any of that. He... ]
I know some birth control pills don't work entirely properly during a heat. But, uhm. I'm on T as well, so... we should be okay. Right?
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.. shit.
[ he probably. really should have thought about that before taking dan heng to bed. in his mind, dan heng is a man, of course, so it hadn't even dawned on him that - fuck. he's such an idiot. running a hand back through his hair, yingxing exhales hard, his brow pinching. ]
I - yeah. I mean, what's done is done, and if you're on bc and T, I'd think we'd be fine, but.. maybe we should be careful from here on out.
[ condoms. dan heng will probably complain about it, it won't be as satisfying as being all filled up, but - but they can't risk a pregnancy. dan feng would really kill him, and while the two of them really like each other, this is their first time together, neither of them is ready for a lifechanging commitment like that. ]
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So, when the other says they'll need to be careful from now on, he nods. No complaints. As much as he liked the sensation of Yingxing filling him up, safety is important, so...
He swallows hard. ]
Once my heat is over, I'll go to my physician right away. Make sure that everything's okay. And... and make sure I'm protected properly for the future, too.
[ Not that Yingxing has said anything about the future, but... it's okay to hope for it, right? ]
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he's the elder here, and by a good margin. the onus was on him to behave appropriately, not to fuck dan heng like they're two stupid teenagers not thinking about the possible ramifications of their actions.
his expression softens, and he turns back to dan heng, leaning one one hand while he lifts the other to tuck an errant tuft of hair behind his pointed ear. then, dipping his head, he touches their brows together, nudging his nose alongside dan heng's. ]
Sounds like a good plan.
[ for now, and in the future. he caught that little comment, and he's not arguing it, not in the slightest. he wants more of this, more of them. ]
All right, let's get cleaned up, and I'll head to the pharmacy while you eat. I, uh.. don't have anything on hand.
[ he doesn't bring people back to his apartment, generally speaking, unless they're in a trusting relationship, and considering he hasn't been in any of those recently.. well. anyway, he kisses dan heng's soft mouth, then finally pulls away to get to his feet. ]
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He offers the older man a small, shaky smile, more than grateful for the way he's helping to calm him down, and when Yingxing says he'll head to the pharmacy while Dan Heng eats, he nods. As much as he doesn't want to be separated from the other right now, he knows that it's what's best, so...
Ah, and... speaking of cleaning up... as they stand up, glowing eyes flick back to the mess they've made, memory surfacing once again now that the worst of the panic is over. ]
By the way, I... last night, before you came upstairs, I... I needed more of your scent, so. [ He sighs, cheeks pink and expression apologetic. ] There's a bunch of your clothes in here too. If we've ruined anything beyond cleaning, I'll pay for replacements.
[ He offers him a small, wry smile. ]
I told you I was thinking about you.
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.. and address the mess. yingxing looks down at the tangled pile of bedding and clothes, all soaked through with sweat and slick and cum. he arches a brow. ]
We really outdid ourselves.
[ and as for his clothing in the pile - yingxing's smile sharpens a little, and he sets a hand at dan heng's back to begin tugging him gently toward the en suite bathroom. ]
Don't worry about the clothes. I'm sure it's all washable, and if it isn't, they're only clothes. [ he winks. ] A small price to pay for your attention.
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Contented for now, he follows the guitarist through to the en suite bathroom—and pauses in the doorway, hesitant. ]
Maybe... you should clean up first, and I can start the laundry? And I'll clean up and eat while you're out?
[ It's not that he doesn't want to share the en suite with Yingxing—far from it, really, with the opposite being the truth of the matter. It's just... if they're in there together, part of him isn't sure he'll be able to resist, and that's just making their current problem all the worse... ]
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better not test it. ]
Right. No, you go ahead and wash up, I'll shower downstairs. You can start laundry while I'm gone if you want, but you don't need to feel obligated to.
[ catching dan heng by the wrist, yingxing pulls him in to press a kiss to his lips, then another to his brow. ]
Everything is going to be fine.
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[ Dan Heng acquieses with a small smile, tilting his head into each of those kisses in turn and leaving his own behind. No matter what his own anxiety might have to say about this whole thing, he trusts Yingxing, appreciates the other's solution to the issue—not to mention the calm way in which he talks, grounding, calming. ]
Alright. I'll see how I feel once I've bathed. Thank you, Yingxing.
[ A pause as he hovers in the ensuite doorway. ]
I know it will be.
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[ yingxing winks, casting him one last smile before allowing dan heng to slip away into the bathroom, while he himself snags a spare towel and a set of fresh clothing, then heads downstairs. stark naked. good thing this building is quite high up.
after that, it's time to shower and dress, to get down to that pharmacy as quickly as possible. yingxing scrubs himself clean, then tosses on a loose tee and some fitted jeans before he's snagging the keys to his bike and out the door, riding down several blocks to the nearest pharmacy. they're not near to the alchemy commission, so it's a bit of a drive, but not bad at all, and it gives him some time to get some fresh air.
he buys.. a lot of condoms. better safe than sorry, really, and dan heng's heat will last a few more days still, so it's best to be prepared so he won't need to run out again. it's some forty minutes or so by the time he returns, kicking off his shoes and setting his helmet down beside the door. dan heng might very well still be bathing. ]
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Before long at all, though, he finds himself horny all over again.
The first groan is one of frustration. How is he meant to be a functioning member of society if his body is going to do this to him? He's not even sure it's been a full hour yet, but he's sweating and his legs are rubbing together and—
The next several groans are those of pleasure as he fucks himself with his fingers, lying back in the tub. Aeons, he wants Yingxing to come back and make a mess of him again, but for now this will have to do— ]
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locking the door, he sets down the bag and shrugs off his coat, hanging it up beside the door before he's heading back upstairs, following the sound of dan heng's pleasure. rapping his knuckles against the doorframe, he pushes the door open. ]
Knock knock.
[ he invites himself in without further preamble, his smile slanted as he approaches the tub, where dan heng makes a pretty, erotic picture of himself, fingers deep in his cunt already. ]
Insatiable, aren't you?
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Are you going to keep teasing me, or are you going to help me?
[ The words come with surprising bite, enough that Dan Heng's cheeks color in the very next moment. ]
I. Uh. Sorry, I just... ngh. Frustrated...
[ After the sensations that the other put him through last night, there's no way that his fingers are ever going to be enough again. ]
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Heh, don't apologize. It's hot when you're feisty.
[ but yingxing isn't so cruel as to leave him unattended. he hums, thoughtful, before sinking down onto the floor beside the tub and dipping his left hand into the water, smoothing his palm along dan heng's thigh. ]
Mmm, now, what to do.. [ he murmurs, leaning in closer so his lips brush dan heng's ear, murmuring directly against it. ] My fingers and my voice? Or my mouth?
[ his hand is already traveling, dipping below dan heng's own to slide a finger through the seam of his ass, teasing the hole there just to gauge dan heng's reaction. ]
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Although it's not relief for too long—there's barely a moment for it before the older man's mouth murmurs against his ear, sending shudders of pleasure down his spine even as his own fingers continue to push insistently into his cunt. His voice?
Aeons, as much as he wants to feel the other's mouth on him again, he— ]
O-oh—
[ The fingers of his free hand loose, splay over the side of the tub as he looks at Yingxing, wide-eyed. ]
Oh, that... mn.
[ Whoops. He's meant to give him an answer, isn't he? ]
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Use your words, sweetheart.
[ he teases, with a grin, nuzzling his nose to dan heng's. he doesn't remove his hand, but doesn't go any further either, just circles that tight little hole with the pad of his middle finger, slow and soft. ]
Good, or not good?
[ because anything dan heng doesn't like will stop immediately. ]
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I think... I think good? I'm not sure, I... this is new for me.
[ His cheeks are warm. ]
But I... I like your voice.
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Mm. That's okay, you can figure it out in time.
[ and it's not like they can do much with his ass without lubricant anyway, water makes for terrible lube. but he can touch lightly, at least, he can apply pressure and rub slowly, and even though dan heng won't have a prostate, that doesn't matter - the nerves around that tight ring are sensitive for all sexes and genders.
so he keeps at it, applying a little more pressure as he presses kisses along dan heng's cheekbone, back to his ear again, his voice low and rough. ]
Keep fucking yourself, baby. Just for me. Don't stop.
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He leans back, hips caught between arching up into his own movements and pressing back into Yingxing's touch, a soft whimper on his lips. ]
Fuck—
[ He bites the sound back in the next moment though, not wanting to hear his own voice at all. What he wants is... ]
Keep talking. Please. Keep talking to me—
[ As it is, he's not sure he'll last much longer... ]
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Mmm.. you're so tight for me. So wet.. gods, it feels so good to be inside of you, baby.
[ he murmurs, dragging his tongue along the taper of dan heng's ear, whispering. ]
You take my cock so good, do you know that? So deep.. I love how you beg for me. I love how you drive me out of my mind.
[ his fingers continue to work, tracing slowly, rhythmically, until he finally begins pushing against that hold. he doesn't shove inside, doesn't want to hurt him, just presses against him, giving him the sensation of the beginnings of penetration. ]
And your taste - my mouth waters just thinking of putting my mouth on you, drinking down all that slick, feeling you squirm beneath me when I suck your clit and fuck you with my fingers. I could do it all day, until my jaw aches.
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He's squirming now, embarrassingly close to his end when he was holding on perfectly fine just before, mouth all but watering as he whines and rolls his hips. ]
I—ngh, Yingxing... I'm close—
[ He doesn't get to say much more than that. He cuts himself off with a moan, hips arching up hard into his hand as he loses himself, slick gushing from his cunt as his head tilts into the other's whispers. ]
Fuck....
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There's my good boy.
[ he says softly, now sliding his palm back up the inside of dan heng's thigh and down again, slow and soothing, squeezing lightly, helping him relax from the high of his orgasm. another soft kiss to his jaw, then another. ]
Feeling good enough to get washed up properly, now?
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Dan Heng is fully aware of the fact that he came more to the sound of Yingxing's voice than anything either of them was doing to him. Embarrassing, isn't it? His cheeks are flushed with heat, but he nods, reaching for the soap. He'd like to talk about it, he thinks, but... after. Once he's dry. And fed. ]
Yeah. This shouldn't take too long...
[ And he sets about scrubbing himself, all business, eyes fixed carefully away form the other man even as he can feel the thrum of his heat purring away in his belly, unsatisfied with an orgasm from his fingers alone. ]
I'm starting to feel it again, but... I should eat first too. Right?
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[ he's happy to fuck dan heng as many times as he needs until his heat is over - and after - but not at the cost of his health. he's burning through a lot of calories simply existing here, he needs to replenish them, and increase his water intake, all but immediately.
so. yingxing presses a kiss to dan heng's temple, then draws back, getting to his feet and drying his hand on a towel. ]
I'll heat some things up while you finish up.
[ and he'll.. start laundry, while he's at it. by the time dan heng finishes with his bath, he'll find the bed stripped and redressed, with a large pile of towels sitting at the bedside, and the scent of food wafting up from down the stairs. ]
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Mm.. that smells good.
[ He makes his way down the stairs just as he is, towel tied around his torso, grateful for the size because it allows his tail to poke out without lifting the fabric too much. Maybe he should put something else on, but he gets the feeling it won't be like this for too long anyway. ]
Is this what you made last night? It smells amazing.
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[ it's the curry he'd prepared the night before, made even more fragrant and flavorful by its time spent resting overnight. there is fresh rice in a bowl, as well as a pitcher of water, but yingxing hovers around the refrigerator. ]
Want something to drink? Soda? Tea? Beer?
[ the third is what he grabs for himself, cracking the cap open with a bottle opener and setting it down at his place at the table. looking over dan heng, he grins. ]
You look good like that.
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When he does, he pauses and looks up, blinking as he has the decency to look a little embarrassed. Swallowing, he clears his throat, and then nods. ]
I'll have a beer too, actually. Please.
[ Normally he's much more a tea type, or even soda over beer, but with everything that's happened over the last few days, he feels like he needs it right now—
His thoughts are brought to a screeching halt by the compliment, and he looks up wth a blushing smile. ]
Yeah? I thought about asking for one of your shirts, but I can stay like this if you want...
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with dan heng sorted, yingxing slides into the seat opposite to him, taking a drink before scooping up his own serving. he doesn't have to ask if it's good - dan heng is making it obvious enough with his appetite. it's good enough, apparently. ]
Well.. you'd definitely look pretty cute in one of my shirts, too.
[ seeing it falling off of his narrower shoulders, fucking him silly while he wears it.. yeah, yingxing could get behind that. ]
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To the compliment, he looks up with a wry smile, something amused written into the depths of his eyes. ]
Maybe I'll ask, then.
[ His head tilts, and it's probably obvious to the other man that he already is asking. He quite likes the idea of being comforted by the other's scent constantly around him anyway. ]
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he keeps spooning his own curry into his mouth, savoring the flavor, enjoying the meat and vegetables and soft rice all at once, with an appreciative hum. it's pretty good, if he does say so himself. ]
Oh? Well.. who am I to deny you?
[ he absolutely wants to see dan heng in one of his shirts. another few bites, and a deep drink of beer. ]
Let me finish up, and I'll grab one for you. Do you want any more to eat?
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And, when he's told that he won't be denied, he smiles all the more prettily.
To Yingxing's other question though, he shakes his head, resting a hand at his own stomach. ]
No, thank you. It was delicious, but I just ate so fast I might make myself sick if I keep going.
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I figured as much.
[ probably for the best. dan heng can have more later, when yingxing inevitably nags him to eat again after a few more hours of exhausting each other. there's still a good amount of curry left, and the congee he'd prepared as well, but a week is a long time.. he'll need to stock up.
once finished, yingxing downs the rest of his beer and sits back with a sigh. that really hit the spot. ]
So are you going to tell me when you need to eat next, or do I have to set a timer?
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I obviously didn't forget on purpose, [ he says, and even to his own ears he sounds a little sullen. ] There are just.. there are a lot of things going on with my body right now, and sometimes it's hard to know what to listen to first—
[ And when one of the things he wants is so obviously here, well... ]
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So a timer, is what you're saying. Got it.
[ he teases, then pushes his chair back so that he can stand, gathering up their bowls to let them start soaking in the sink, then tossing his empty bottle into the recycling bin. after that, he'll start packing the leftovers back away again. ]
Let me clean this up, then we'll get you that shirt.
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Is there anything I can do to help? You've done so much for me in just the last twenty-four hours...
[ The food, the washing... not to mention all the sex... and he—
frowns as he spies his phone lighting up on the counter, on silent for the past whole day.
Oh, he'd completely forgotten about—
52 missed calls
Fuck—
His voice is strained as he answers the phone. ]
Gege, hi—
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hi, dan heng says, to which his brother bites his sentence off immediately, hissing into the receiver.
don't you "gege" me - where are you? what's going on? why haven't you been picking up your phone? do you have any idea how worried i've been, trying to get ahold of you? i nearly contacted the realm-keeping commission-
oh. oh no. yingxing bites down on his lower lip hard to keep in an audible groan of dismay when he hears dan feng's sharp tone, pitched enough that he can hear every word even without straining to listen.
i thought you were dead in a gutter somewhere! you weren't home all night! you had better have a good explanation- ]
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I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I don't. I...
[ He huffs out. He can't just tell Dan Feng here's come here of all places, he'll kill him, he's always told him not to mess with rock stars, and if he were to find out it were one of his friends surely that would be so much worse...
But at the same time, his brother has been at his place, is maybe still there, and...
Deep breath. ]
I'm with a friend, [ he says, voice low. ] I'm... I'm in the middle of my first heat. I needed to be somewhere safe. I'm sorry, my phone was on silent and I didn't realize—
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a friend? you're - what?
there's a silence on the other end of the line for a few moments, before dan feng exhales a heavy sigh. he'd known that this day would come eventually, and likely soon, considering dan heng's age, and how most vidyadhara would have experienced their first heat or rut years prior. even still..
you could have told me. you didn't need to hide it from me, i could have told you what to do - which friend? not stelle or march, i contacted them, too, i'm surprised you're not with them. is it someone you trust? are you all right? ]
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At least his brother isn't yelling anymore—
Another deep, slow breath. ]
I'm not... wasn't trying to hide it from you. When I texted you to cancel, I didn't realize. Since then I just haven't really been thinking right. Honestly, I forgot my phone existed until I saw it just now. I'm so sorry—
[ Is it someone he trusts? Is he alright? ]
Yes, though. Yes, I'm with a friend I can trust. I promise. I'm alright. I'm being cared for.
[ His cheeks heat at the understatement in those words. ]
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there's a long silence on the other end of the line. dan feng hasn't missed the fact that dan heng in fact failed to specify which friend, and he's quite sure he knows all of dan heng's close friends.. at least, he thought he did. maybe he doesn't know his baby brother as well as he thinks he does.
mm.
.. all right. as long as you're safe. if you need anything, anything at all, call me, all right? i'll be here. i know what it's like.
which might not be comforting for dan heng to hear, but it's still the truth. dan feng worries. he always worries. ]
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[ It's with a sigh of relief that he hangs up the phone, looking up at Yingxing—and belatedly realizing the towel barely covering him anymore. He's quick to grab it and wrap it around himself again, even as his cheeks flush and he frowns at the older man. ]
You look happy... [ But before he can even settle back on that thought, he confesses: ]
Gege has always told me to stay away from rock stars. He'll kill me, if he knows I came here. I know he's your friend but... [ His expression, now, turns apologetic. ] Please don't tell him I've been here.
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but his smile persists as he moves toward him, resting his hands on dan heng's hips to pull him in nearer, dipping his head to touch their brows together. yeah, he's happy. happy that dan heng trusts him. happy that he feels like he's being taken care of. ]
.. you know he'll figure it out, right?
[ he says softly, then lifts one hand to cradle dan heng's jaw, his roughened thumb smoothing over his cheek. ]
I won't tell him, but he's not stupid. If you want to continue this.. it's only a matter of time.
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Maybe he'd say as much too, correctly interpreting that brow raise for what it is, if it weren't for the elder's arms reaching out to pull him in near. Dan Heng smiles as his own head tips up, as their foreheads come together, and—
He grimaces at Yingxing's words even as that roughened thumb smooths so gently over his skin. ]
I know he's not stupid, I just—
[ "If you want to continue this—"
Aeons, this is not a conversation he should be having in the middle of a heat, is it? ]
I want to continue this, [ he says anyway, voice quiet but strong. Stubborn. ] But... if I tell him now, who knows what he'll do...
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.. all right, well, tell him when you're ready, then. I won't say anything.
[ it'll be difficult to avoid dan feng's scrutiny, but. he'll have to manage it somehow. ]
Just keep in mind that if he finds out before you tell him, you know it'll be a hundred times worse. [ nudging their noses together, yingxing hums. ] But you don't need me to tell you that.
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He nods slightly, nudges his nose back against Yingxing's. ]
I'm not saying we wait ages. Just... let me get through this heat, first? [ There's something pleading in his tone. ] That's all. You know that the moment I say anything, he'll be here to yell at me, and right now I just... mn.
[ Of course, he hasn't considered what Dan Feng might want to say or do to Yingxing, focused only on his brother's protective nature towards him... ]
Right now I just want to be here with you. If that's alright with you.
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his hand falls again, both smoothing around his sides to the small of his back, scooping him in close. his voice is quiet, private between them. ]
It's definitely all right with me.
[ it makes sense that dan heng would want to wait until his heat passes. just, any longer than that and they're playing with fire. for now, though.. for now, it's just them. just them, and these walls holding them in, this little world all their own. ]
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Okay, [ he breathes, and then adjusts himself, standing on tiptoes so that he can brush his mouth against the older man's, his smile still hinting at the corners of his own. ] Good.
[ And there's a part of him that still wants a shirt to wear, yes, but with their renewed proximity, the more insistent part of him is content to stay like this, to slip one of his legs between Yingxing's just a little, allowing him to draw in that litte closer to the older man. ]
Then... why don't we pick up where we left off? [ His voice is low, sweetened with an onset of his heat he hasn't even noticed physically yet, driven too perhaps by the leftover spike of adrenaline from the ringing of his phone. ]
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humming low in his throat, yingxing leans in, their lips brushing together as he breathes in the scent of his own soap on dan heng's skin. ]
Mm.. I think you're right.
[ he murmurs, then kisses him with assurance, and just a little force - less than what he'd used upstairs in bed, but enough to feel like burning need. his hands travel down, over the soft towel to dan heng's thighs, cupping behind them to lift him easily up onto the countertop to sit. ]
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Is this hygienic? [ he wonders, voice low, though it should be clear from the smile on his face that honestly, he's not altogether too worried.
(He might be, normally. But it's just the two of them, and he's in heat.)
He proves it with a stroke of his ankle along the back of Yingxing's leg, a lazy smile on his lips as he leans in to kiss him once more. ]
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The counter will survive. Your ass will, too.
[ he teases, tipping his chin up into the kiss, eager to taste him again. resting both hands on dan heng's thighs, yingxing murmurs, pleased, as they slide upward, gently slipping beneath the towel to follow the warmth of his skin. heat kindles in his belly, a small flame for now, but growing quickly as they kiss, as his palms smooth higher over soft, delicate skin. maybe it helps that he's an alpha, that he reacts naturally to dan heng's heat, spurred by it in a way a full human might not be. ]
You're so beautiful..
[ he whispers, kissing a path down dan heng's throat to where it meets his collar. ]
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You think so? [ he mumbles. This time, he doesn't fight it, although there is a smile on his face as one of his hands moves to his side to brace on the counter, something playful glinting behind the glow. ] I don't know, I think you might be a little biased...
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Maybe a little.. but it's still true.
[ even in his less eye-catching skin, dan heng is lovely to look at, handsome and cute, sweet, tempting to take home. yingxing isn't picky, he likes dan heng no matter what he looks like. finds him beautiful either way. his kisses continue, pressing downward over the soft, small swell of dan heng's breasts while his hands slide up to his hips now, thumbs pressing into the hollows. ]
I'm glad you came here. [ he says, nuzzling soft skin. ] That you trust me.
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He's still somewhere lost in the middle of all that when the other's kisses trail down over his breasts, making his breath catch as hands cup his hips, and those soft words continue. ]
I'm glad I came here too. I din't even... it was like instinct. [ His cheeks redden. ] I thought of you, and I just... had to be here.
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Good thing you did. I don't know that I would've gone for it, with you.. not unless you made it really obvious you wanted me. Which you did.
[ not because he wasn't interested in dan heng - far from it - but because he's so much older than him, because dan feng would be angry, because he's a rock star.. there's so many reasons he had hesitated, reasons it had felt inappropriate, even when, with nearly anyone else, he would have made his interest clear. but he doesn't want dan heng to misunderstand, so he goes on, even as he nudges their noses together and lifts one hand to begin unwinding that pesky towel. ]
I've thought you were cute from the moment we met.
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[ But then his heat happened, and...
Dan Heng shakes his head, nudging his nose back against Yingxing's as the other man starts to unwind his towel, leaving him naked on the counter. ]
But... I said already I'm glad I came here. I'm really glad I came here. Knowing what I know now.
[ A pause, as his lips peck briefly against Yingxing's. ]
If anything, I'm annoyed I made myself wait so long.
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[ cute, though, that he believed that yingxing only thought of him as dan feng's kid brother. maybe he might have, if he weren't so cute, if yingxing wasn't attracted to him quickly. fortunately for them both, that wasn't the case.
the towel drops, and yingxing presses another kiss to dan heng's mouth, then another, his hands sliding down his shoulders and forearms, grasping his warm fingers for a moment before they return to dan heng's sides. much better, now that he can feel so much skin. ]
Now, tell me how I might serve you, my prince.
[ he teases, thumbs gliding over dan heng's ribs, skirting the undersides of his breasts as he begins to kiss along his jaw again. ]
Or would you prefer that I take the lead?
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With the towel gone completely, he feels exposed—just for a moment, though; that feeling is forgotten quickly in the wake of fresh kisses, of fingers skimming his sides and grasping his hands for a moment, or thumbs skating along the undersides of his breasts as a teasing murmur brushes against the kisses left over his jaw.
Dan Heng feels his cheeks burn. Serve, prince—words strong as they are playful, making him bite his lip as he cants his head back just a little, giving Yingxing more space to kiss.
And for a moment, he's a little torn. Are there things he wants Yingxing to do? Yes, especially as the pulse of his heat starts up again, heady and slow and wanting in his belly. Is he embarrassed to say as much? Certainly. But also...
Fingers curl into Yingxing's pale hair. ]
Surprise me, [ he murmurs, his voice husky enough that it takes him aback for a moment. ] Show me something new.
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[ well, there's only so much they can do on the kitchen counter, and yingxing has already very much used much of his arsenal, but he can try something different. perhaps.. going slow. steady. taking his time making dan heng unravel, maybe edging him to infuriated begging.
so he begins, kissing a slow, gentle path down dan heng's throat, nuzzling at his collar where his shoulder and neck meet, breathing hot against his pulse. meanwhile, yingxing's hands massage his thighs, grasping the supple flesh of them and squeezing, thumbs sliding along their insides until they meet in the middle. ]
I'll do my best.
[ the knuckles of his right hand drag down below dan heng's navel, sliding through his slit, slow and teasing as he purrs. his kisses move downward, head dipping until he can close his mouth over a pretty pink nipple. ]
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The fingers in Yingxing's hair tighten, and his other hand finds the edge of the bench, holding to its edge. When the other's knuckles drag over him, slow and teasing, he gasps, and his own knuckles whiten from their grip. And when that mouth closes over him, he groans.
Dan Heng is smart, and— ]
Aeons... you're going to tease me, aren't you...
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Sharp one, aren't you.
[ though of course, he already knew that. dan heng is nothing if not incredibly smart.
but yingxing does not stop, his tongue rolling as he continues to suck, using two fingers to spread the lips of dan heng's cunt so that he might slide a third between them, gathering slick to begin rubbing at his clit. it's already warm and swollen beneath the pad of his finger, and yingxing strokes it slowly along the underside, teasing it to further firmness.
every movement is languid, if deliberate. he wants to have dan heng begging by the time he is finished. ]
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Still, he's not about to complain. Not when Yingxing's fingers and mouth both feel so good against him, tongue rolling and teasing even as he sucks at one too-sensitive nipple, making the younger man arch his back up against the sensation; fingers spreading his cunt to rub over his clit with his own slick and making him shudder in delight. ]
Nngh... mmm, like that is good... right there...
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Feels good?
[ he murmurs, then kisses his way across to the other, mouthing at the soft flesh of his breath before laving attention on this nipple instead. but not to leave the first unattended - yingxing's free hand lifts to cup his breast, thumbing over the already sensitive nub.
and all the while he's slowly stroking his clit, gathering more slick when he needs it. ]
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Y-yeah. Fuck... so good. More, please—
[ He knows that he won't get more for asking, that the other is enjoying teasing him, and yet he can't quite help but ask for it, hips arching towards the other even as a soft whimper escapes his lips. ]
Yingxing... nngh...
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[ dan heng wanted something different, after all, so as sweet as he sounds asking for more, yingxing instead slows down, applying pressure evenly, but slowly, teasing at his clit to make dan heng squirm.
and all the while he's splitting his attention, still touching his breast, sucking at his nipple, his own cock beginning to ache in his jeans, pressing hot to dan heng's thigh. humming, yingxing's finger slides down and dips into his cunt, pushing carefully inside. he knows that he doesn't need to be quite so cautious, dan heng has taken much more this past twenty-four hours, but that doesn't matter, he's trying to drive the young man crazy.
he's only in to the second knuckle before pulling out again, in again, out again, in shallow little thrusts of his middle finger. ]
So wet for me..
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He should have known... should have predicted the other would play like this, teasing as he's always been even in friendship—really, he only has himself to blame for it, doesn't he? It doesn't stop him from writhing, though, from tangling his fingers harder in the other's hair as Yingxing starts to thrust his middle finger slow and shallow, making Dan Heng's head fall back on a low moan. He can feel how hard he is, he knows he wants him too— ]
Fuck... ah, damnit.. you're being unfair...
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[ yingxing chuckles, soft and gently, nuzzling his way back up dan heng's chest to find his mouth and kiss him, nipping at his lower lip. perhaps this is a little more bratty than usual, considering dan heng's heat, but he's been fucked silly all night, surely he can handle a little teasing, right?
his finger sinks deeper, in to the last knuckle, curling inside of him. ]
Are you demanding more?
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[ The fingers on the counter tighten, knuckles white as he writhes. He can handle teasing, but he's whining because of course he is, because it feels good and he wants more, and he's in heat and he's so horny—
He sucks in a sharp, trembling breath.
Is he demanding? No, he... he's asking, he... ]
Yes—
[ He means "no", but he can't think of the actual verb for what he's doing, what he wants to do, so... this will have to be enough. ]
Yes. Give me... give me more, Yingxing...
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well. they say it's always the quiet ones that are the wildest, right? ]
Of course. Anything you need.
[ he says, then slides a second finger in beside the first, so easily for how wet he is. both now sink in deep, massaging dan heng's upper walls, rubbing slowly, deep within him. ]
I want to taste you again, baby.
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Though, when Yingxing mentions that he wants to taste him again, he groans despite himself, the older man will feel his cunt walls flutter and tighten in anticipation and desire.
Dan Heng sucks in a shaky breath. ]
Then—ngh—then you should.
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Your wish is my command.
[ he grins, then presses their mouths together in a hot, lingering kiss, before he's sinking down to his knees on the floor, his fingers still pushed deep as he uses his shoulders to coax dan heng's legs further apart.
yingxing wastes no time. still curling his fingers, he presses his mouth hot to that pretty cunt, dragging his tongue over his plump labia before diving right onto his clit, rubbing his tongue against it. ]
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The moment Yingxing is settled against him, Dan Heng's fingers curl into his hair again, and he tries not to grip too tightly as the other's tongue swipes over his cunt, slow and delightful and the slimmest of warnings for what comes next as the older man all but dives onto his clit, making his hips buck in pleasured shock. ]
Oh—oh, fuck...
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and all the while his fingers work, sliding in and out of his body, fucking him just as slowly as the pace denotes, the kitchen filling with the lewd wet sound it creates.
he never tires of this. oral is just about one of his favorite things to offer a partner, despite the fact that his own needs go ignored - it doesn't matter. he loves the taste, loves the experience, loves to feel dan heng shudder with pleasure as he grips yingxing's hair and bucks his hips in search of more. ]
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The room fills with them: with the wet sounds of Yingxing's fingers moving against him as Dan Heng writhes and moans, with the mingling scents of the remnants of breakfast, of his own sopping cunt practically dripping all over again with need, of the older man's growing arousal, thick with the same aromas that have been driving Dan Heng mad for the past day.
(And, if Yingxing thinks he'll leave him needy after this, he has another thing coming. As much as Dan Heng's heat wants satiation, he wants to please the other man as well...)
With another groan, he pulls his fingers from the counter, both hands buried now in Yingxing's hair. ]
Please—
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and yingxing's enjoyment is exceedingly clear in the way that he works, how he laves with his tongue like a thirsty dog, how he moans against dan heng's clit like it's the best thing he's ever tasted. his fingers climb deep, and yingxing begins to pick up the pace once he feels both of dan heng's hands in his hair now, needy as he grinds up against yingxing's face. ]
You're so good, baby..
[ he murmurs between laps of his tongue and soft sucking sounds, curling his fingers upward to better stroke those sweet, sensitive spots inside of him. ]
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He doesn't think he'll last much longer, suddenly, and it doesn't help matters when Yingxing's fingers curl, stroking those more sensitive places, the pace of his ministrations sped up in response to the fingers practically tugging at his hair. ]
Y-Yingxing, I... fuck—
[ Dan Heng thinks wildly that he's cursed more in the past 24 hours than he has in the entirety of his life. ]
Please, just... hngh, a little more— faster, harder, something I'm so close—
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were dan heng not in heat right now, yingxing would absolutely tease him further, would stop immediately and instead edge him right into oblivion, but alas. next time, perhaps, when dan heng is out of his heat - right now it would be more cruel than sexy, so he files that idea away for another time, when they're feeling adventurous.
another time. what an exciting prospect.
for now, yingxing plows on, sucking hard at dan heng's clit, laving the sensitive underside with his tongue while his fingers curl and fuck him harder, deeper, trying to pull him over the edge. ]
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When he is pulled over the edge, he's too loud by halves, tail thrashing under him and fingers tugging as he gushes slick over Yingxing's fingers, his mouth, his chin. His head falls back with a thunk against the counter, a harsh exhale on his lips as he starts to come back down. ]
You're... too good at that, [ he mumbles, almost mindless in the aftermath of his pleasure. ] Better than I ever imagined.
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Better than you imagined, hmm?
[ wiping his mouth and chin with his knuckles, yingxing straightens up and stands comfortably between dan heng's knees, resting both hands on his hips as he nudges their noses together, still grinning. ]
And just how often did you imagine it?
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And then, belatedly, he realizes what he said, and his face turns pink, a groan of frustration and embarrassment on his lips; if it weren't for the nose that nudges against his in the next moment, he'd probably hide his face in both hands. ]
I... ugh. I didn't mean to say that, [ he admits, his voice low. But... if they've just gone this far... surely he can...
A breath. ]
Often. I imagined it pretty often. And, um. [ Another breath, and then a brave addition rushes forth: ] The other way around, too.
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You don't have to hide it, you know. It's just flattering to me, to know you've thought of me before.
[ he's a rock star, people fantasize about him all the time, he's sure, but it's different to be wanted by someone that he wants, too. it's different. better. he wants dan heng to keep thinking about him like that, to keep desiring him.
he tilts his head. ]
.. the other way around, though? Does that appeal to you?
[ his cock twitches at the very idea. nevermind that he's still incredibly hard in his pants that it's all but painful, but he'd never ask dan heng to do something he's not comfortable with. ]
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Of course it does, [ he says, his voice soft. ] I want... [ Ugh, it's embarrassing to put into words, just like it's embarrassing to have Yingxing know that he's thought about this. It's not that he wants to hide it, it's just...
He's not used to letting anyone see him quite so... closely.
Dan Heng's tongue traces over his lower lip. ]
I've... never done it before, but. The idea of making you feel as good as you make me feel, it's... I like that.
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Just being inside of you makes me feel good. That's all I need.
[ dan heng doesn't need to feel like he has to suck his dick to make him happy. as much as yingxing would absolutely, positively enjoy it. ]
.. that said, it's different if you want to just because you want to, you know? [ just like yingxing wants to go down on dan heng.. because he likes it. because it feels good to him. ] I obviously wouldn't turn you down.
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I'm not asking you because I feel like I have to. I'm asking you because I want to. I want you to feel that good. I want to be the one who makes you feel it.
[ He nudges his nose against the other man's again, sweet with embarrassment but also something warm, affectionate. ]
So...
[ And he bites his lip, a flare of heat in his cheeks. ]
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... so.
[ flashing a toothy grin, yingxing pushes in close so he can scoop dan heng right up into his arms, legs around his waist. the counter is going to need a good clean, still wet with dan heng's slick, but that can absolutely wait, considering what dan heng is offering, and how hard he still is.
he carries dan heng not to the stairs, but instead through the kitchen to the living area beside it, dropping heavily down onto the large sofa with dan heng in his lap. ]
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And mn, fuck, he's so hard. It would be so easy to grind himself down against him, but—
No, that's not what he wants to do here.
He braces a hand on Yingxing's chest, lifts his own hips, pulls himself back from the temptation until he's sat beside him, eyes bright and warm and excited. ]
Be patient with me, [ he murmurs, leaning over him, starting slow with kisses pressed to the corners of his mouth, to the underside of his mouth, to his chin. His fingers work on the other's shirt, baring his chest to give him something to continue working with. ] I want to get this right.
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already his abdomen is tightening up in anticipation. ]
Take all the time you need.
[ he says, brushing the hair from dan heng's eyes as his shirt pulled at - and yingxing simply snags it by the collar at his nape and sweeps the whole thing off of his body. it'll need to be washed anyway. ]
Don't worry, it's not exactly difficult.
[ yingxing is.. big, yeah, and it's unlikely that dan heng will be able to swallow all of him, unless he has some secret lack of gag reflex, but really? a hot mouth on his cock, even inexperienced, goes a long way. ]
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Besides, the majority of his attention is focused on what he can do for the other man.
With a slight smile in his direction, Dan Heng continues to kiss his way down over Yingxing's chest, and he's trying not to tease too much when the other is already so achingly hard, but he's curious, too, enjoying what exploration he can, mouth wandering over the lines of the other's muscles as his fingers undo his pants and tug at them just enough to free Yingxing's cock to the air.
Mercifully, perhaps, he's a little quicker after that, kissing his way down over the other's abdomen and then straightening up just enough to offer him a smile before parting his lips and taking the tip of his cock between them. ]
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then at last his cock is freed, and yingxing breathes a sigh of relief now that it is no longer trapped within the too tight confines of his jeans. resting his head back, he slips one hand into dan heng's soft hair, watching with blown pupils as he lowers his head to mouth at the tip of his cock.
fuck. he looks so good like that, all soft and demure with an aching cock against his lips. ]
Baby.. you look - mm..
[ he's cut off when those pliant lips close around the head of him, and yingxing's eyes flutter briefly shut, pre beading at his tip. ]
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It's a lot of different things, but in the midst of his desire, he's confident he can do it.
Dan Heng sighs, starts with just the head of him, licking and suckling, exploring with his tongue and mouth. He's a little hesitant at first but after a moment he reaches out with a hand too, bracing one against Yingxing's thigh but wrapping the other around his base, slow strokes over the parts of him his mouth doesn't yet reach.
His lips part for a breath, and his eyes flick up. ]
Tell me if there's something you really like? [ he whispers, and then presses down again, his mouth this time moving a little lower. ]
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You mean all of it?
[ he says breathlessly, then groans low and deep as dan heng takes him in again, deeper this time. yingxing is big enough that dan heng truly has his hands (and mouth) full, and watching how wide he has to open his pretty mouth to take him in is intoxicating. even when he's only toying with his tip, yinxging is shuddering with pleasure.
he's had plenty of blowjobs in his life by people more experienced, but this feels incredible, just by sheer merit of who it is in his lap right now. ]
You're good at this, baby..
[ yingxing whispers, one arm resting on the arm of the sofa while the opposite hand continues to smooth through dan heng's hair, pushing it back from his face and eyes to better see him work. keeping his hips still is a challenge, but one he meets. ]
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But Dan Heng is nothing if not stubborn, especially when it comes to something he wants to do, wants to be good at, and so difficult or not, he keeps at it, lowers his mouth that little more, until he feels he can't possibly stretch any wider right now.
Once he gets used to—sort of, at least—the girth filling his mouth, he starts to move his head, slow bobs against him as he licks and sucks over the skin, humming lowly in response to being told that he's good at it. His hand, slick with his own saliva, strokes over and works the places he can't reach.
It's not easy from this angle, but he wants to see Yingxing's face, to see the pleasure play out, to give him more hint of what works best, and so he peers up, trying to catch his gaze as he moves. ]
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Careful, don't take too much.
[ he murmurs, before dan heng begins to bob his head and yingxing moans, his hips twitching in an effort not to buck upward, to push into that wonderful wet heat. dan heng's mouth is so full already and he's not even halfway down, and gods, he looks so good like that, pumping him with his fist while his sweet mouth works hard. when dan heng hums all around him, yingxing hisses through his teeth, pleasure rippling down his cock and pooling hot in his lap. ]
So good..
[ he pets dan heng's hair, his cock aching, leaking pre against that soft tongue as he fights not to rock his hips - he could never tire of this view, and he knows he won't last too much longer, not after eating dan heng out so voraciously, and seeing that hot mouth around his cock. ]
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—and somewhere, vaguely amidst the building, cloying heat, he wonders if he'll ever be able to take him all—
hand working in firm strokes over him to make sure all of him enjoys it, not just what little Dan Heng can reach.
And the whole time, he watches as well as he can, enjoys the expressions playing over the other's face, the expression he wears that shows the struggle, the pleasure all at once. Selfishly, he wants to be the best he's ever had, and the more he watches, the more he can learn... ]
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Mmm.. that humming - feels good.
[ since he remembers, half-aware, of how dan heng had asked him to mention what he likes. what's working for him. he pushes the fringe from dan heng's eyes, watching the flush of his cheeks, his lips parted around quick exhales. ]
Getting close..
[ he murmurs, his thighs tense with effort, pupils blown wide as he watches dan heng, entranced. ]
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And with that in mind, it's a warning he appreciates, because he remembers just how much Yingxing has in him, knows how quickly his mouth will be flooded by it. It gives him time to relax himself, to prepare for him even as he laps over and around him, enjoying the heated musk under his tongue and lips.
But he doesn't stop, not even once. He wants Yingxing to feel good. He wants him to lose it, to show him how good he can be for him like this... ]
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[ he expects his warning to stop dan heng, to make him pull off and finish him with his hand. he's an alpha, he can give a lot, and dan heng has never done this before, swallowing on the first go seems like biting off more than he can chew (literally). ]
Baby, you don't have to..
[ he says, then hisses, moans, his cock twitching when dan heng makes that soft sound, laving him with his tongue and sucking him down like it's the best thing he's ever tasted. fuck, it's so damned good, he can feel his body tightening up, his heart pounding, his grasp on dan heng's hair tightening as the pleasure twists and churns like a snake coiling in his abdomen. ]
I'm coming -
[ he says, a final warning for dan heng before, a moment later, he comes hard, hips jerking as he spills, thick and hot and plentiful. ]
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Oh, maybe he has indeed bitten off more than he can chew.
Dan Heng has to fight to stop himself from gasping at the speed and volume with which his mouth is suddenly flooded, knowing that doing so will only lead to him choking around the other. He locks his lips shut, does everything he can to relax even as as older man's hips jerk up into his mouth, spilling what feels like load after load after load. Dan Heng swallows, and swallows again, but in the end he's forced to pant out a breath, mouth slipping open and hot seed spilling over his mouth, running down over his jaw and chin as he pants for breath. There's no doubt he's just made a hell of a mess... ]
Ngh... fuck, [ he mumbles, almost mindless with it, blinking slowly as he peers back up at Yingxing again, a smile finding its way back to his lips. ]
Good?
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he groans, his cock twitching, still spilling briefly over dan heng's knuckles before he shudders and falls slack against the couch, rocking his hips up into the circle of dan heng's hand, enjoying the pleasurable aftershocks. ]
Fuck..
[ he whispers harshly, eyes lidded, one thumb smoothing over dan heng's glistening lips and down the messy trail of spend that shines on his chin. ]
.. heh, you're a mess.
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We'll need another shower, [ he responds in the same tone as his laughter, shaking his head as his eyes open again. Part of him feels as if he should apologize, but... well, he gets the feeling Yingxing enjoyed himself, and that makes it all worth it.
What he can say, though, is... ]
I'll try to make less of a mess next time.
[ And he will. He'll practice, if that's what it takes... ]
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No, it's fine. You look good like this.
[ all flush-faced, his lips wet with cum. he looks.. perfectly slutty, which is so vastly different from how dan heng normally purports himself that he can hardly stand the whiplash. in a good way.
a heavy sigh, and yingxing sags bonelessly against the sofa. yeah. a shower. ]
.. gimme like, two minutes.
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There's a part of him that almost doesn't want to tell Yingxing. Now that he's back to himself, the logic of their situation settles on him as cold as ice. Who Yingxing is, who he is, their age difference... just a few barriers among many...
But he's nothing if not honest. It's with a soft sigh that he nudges the other awake, a soft kiss pressed to the underside of his chin. ]
It's over, [ he says, voice soft, once he feels Yingxing stir. ]
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it's almost enough to trigger his rut. almost. but thankfully it hasn't, at least not yet, and he's sure that dan heng's heat must be drawing to a close over the many days they spend together.
sure enough, when yingxing stirs that morning, the thick scent in the air that had surrounded dan heng is much, much thinner. it still lingers in the air like a perfume, but not nearly so strong as it had been before, so when dan heng murmurs that it's over, yingxing isn't surprised.. even if he's a little disappointed. it's been a good week, and they absolutely tore through the collection of condoms he'd bought - any longer and he'd need to make another run to the drugstore. ]
Mmm.. [ he hums, one hand skimming down dan heng's back. well. it was a good week while it lasted - now comes the hard part. ] .. feeling better?
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But after the week they've spent together, the other man deserves more from him, doesn't he? And if Dan Heng is honest... ]
Yes. Physically, at least. But I have to admit I'm a little disappointed, too.
[ It's a bold swing, but an honest one, and that's what's most important as far as he's concerned. Maybe it's selfish, but all that cold logic aside, he knows that he doesn't want this to just end, so... ]
Everything that happened this past week, I've wanted it all for a long time. I was just too much of a coward to say anything before I had no other choice in the matter. First, you were my brother's friend, and then mine, and... I did not want to put that friendship at risk.
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I know. It's scary, making that sort of move on someone, especially if they're a friend.
[ muffling a yawn behind his knuckles, yingxing rubs his eyes then loops that arm around dan heng's middle, keeping him scooped in close. he might not have this for much longer, so he plans to enjoy it as much as he can, while he still is able to. ]
Lucky for you, nothing was at risk.
[ he smiles, nudging his nose alongside dan heng's. ]
I meant it when I said I would keep this going, but if you've changed your mind now that you're out of your heat, I get it.
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Yingxing's nose nudges against his, and Dan Heng turns his head slightly, catching the other's mouth in a brief, soft kiss. ]
I haven't changed my mind, [ he responds, and his voice is quiet, but as serious as it's ever been. His eyes open, glowing teal peering into soft lavender. ] I like you a lot, Yingxing. So it doesn't matter how complicated any of this is.
[ Idly, his fingers smooth down over the other's chest, skating over firm muscle. ]
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[ he exhales a mirthless laugh, and lifts one hand to push the fringe from dan heng's eyes. ]
I must seem like such a creep, chasing after someone so much younger than me.. but I really fucking like you.
[ his smile quirks, and yingxing curls his free arm beneath his head to better look dan heng in the face. sure, dating someone younger is hot in its own way, but he likes dan heng for who he is, for the chemistry they have together, not simply because he's young and hot. ]
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His hand lifts from the older man's chest, fingers tracing lightly over those scars instead, a reminder for when they're done with this conversation. ]
You don't seem like a creep. Why would you? I'm the one who came here.
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.. you came here in heat, driven by a biological urge that didn't really leave much room for consent.
[ and it was only because he knew that dan heng had been into him previously that he allowed it to happen at all - that dan heng had low key wanted into his pants from the moment they began talking. even still, in retrospect, that.. really wasn't enough to go on.
gods, he is a creep, isn't he? yingxing rubs his face with his free hand. ]
The responsible thing to do would've been to gently turn you down until your heat passed.
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Responsible, maybe. But it also would have been cruel. Besides... it's become clear to me that I did a terrible job at hiding my interest before. Maybe in the moment I couldn't consent properly, but...
[ He frowns, a slight heat to his cheeks—but sincerity in his gaze as he looks up at the other quietly. ]
At least in my mind, my consent was always clear, and I think you knew that too. Even then, you asked questions and sought as much of it as you could. So... if you're worried about that, you don't have to be.
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.. you're really sweet.
[ while dan heng might have some points, it's still a naive outlook, and it sure wouldn't stand up against a jury, like as not. consent was blurred at best, even if yingxing asked questions, and given their age difference.. well.
he shakes his head, nudges their noses again. ]
Well, it's a bit belated now, anyway. Besides, I don't regret it, even if maybe I should.
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[ There's a soft insistence in his voice, a stubbornness borne perhaps of the fact that he can still see some hesitance in Yingxing's acceptance of what has happened. Sure, maybe things didn't go perfectly, but when do things go perfectly? Maybe he's biased, but it all worked out for the best anyway, so...
He presses another small kiss to the corner of the older man's mouth—and then pulls back just slightly, looking down to where his fingers are still tracing over old scars. ]
Yingxing... Will you tell me about these?
[ Scars are rarely from anything good, so he might be asking a lot, but... ]
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but dan heng looks so earnest, and they're close enough now that he might as well be honest with him. they were good friends even before all of this, and yingxing trusts him. he sighs through his nose. ]
Some were from my dad.
[ he taps a messy, small, circular scar on his forearm by the wrist - there are several others, scattered up the length of his forearm. but then, turning his arm over reveals the track marks around the seam of his elbow, the ones dan heng had been touching. ]
But these, uh.. I did these to myself. [ he frowns, his brow pinched. it was a decade ago, but he's still not proud of who he was back then. ] Heroin.
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Before he can say anything, though, the other continues to talk, frowning as he explains the truth of the scar. Dan Heng feels his heart break for him. Just as human as anyone else, he's made mistakes—and how could he not, when he's lived so much pain?—and yet there's something on the other man's face that almost reads like... is it guilt? Shame? He can't tell, but...
He looks at him in silence for a moment before he leans forward, a soft brush of his lips against the scars. He says nothing—there's nothing to say, not from someone who can't even begin to comprehend the whole of what he's been through. But at the very least, he can offer acceptance and comfort. ]
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.. it's okay. It was a long time ago.
[ yingxing's start in life had surely been rocky, but he'd like to think that he's finally gotten his shit together - which isn't exactly easy, when he's living as a rock star. temptation is everywhere.
nudging his nose to dan heng's cheek, he presses a kiss there. ]
I'm all right.
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Just because it was a long time ago didn't mean it wasn't terrible. [ No doubt the other will hear the genuine sincerity in his tone as he looks up at him with a thoughtful, quiet expression. ]
I don't really know what else to say, but I want... I want to make sure you know I'm not judging you. I'm just sorry for the things you went through that drove you that far. And... and I'm proud of you for fighting back and coming as far as you have.
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Heh. I don't know what to say.
[ no one's ever really.. said this sort of thing to him, outside of his bandmates, he hardly knows how to react. it's strange, being so open, so raw about something, even if in many ways he's still hiding behind an easy smile. ]
I'll remember that, whenever I need to hear it. Thanks.
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You don't have to say anything, [ he responds quietly, and he presses another kiss against his skin before curling into him and just breathing, letting himself relax for the first time in the better part of a week. What Yingxing came from... it doesn't matter to him.
The only thing that matters that they're here now, like this.
...And like this they stay for a little while, curled up and just enjoying one another until with a soft, reluctant sigh, Dan Heng stretches, looks up at Yingxing. ]
As much as I've enjoyed the last week... I probably need to think about heading back home. Everything's probably a complete mess.
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but the time soon comes when dan heng withdraws, and yingxing knew it was coming, but it'll still be sad to see him go. for the best, really - this is still incredibly new between them, they can't rush into seeing each other every single day. they have to date like normal people, and besides, they can hang out any time they like.. well, busy schedules allowing.
so yingxing sits up, tossing a grin over his shoulder, and offering a hand. ]
It'll be quiet here by myself for awhile, heh, but I'm sure you've got a lot of backed up work to get to.
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Mm... going home will be strange, too. [ If he were Stelle, he might make some silly comment about being without his personal chef. A way to separate himself from it a little, to make it easier. But while he can be awkward with his feelings at times, he still wants to be honest, and so he doesn't do that. Instead, he takes the other's hand, and squeezes it. ] I'll miss you, but.. yeah, I do. I know you do, too.
[ Those skipped practices didn't go unnoticed, after all. ]
Besides, we can..
[ A pause. Ugh. How does he say this? ]
I'd like to see you again soon, though. If that's okay.
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Mm. I'd like that, too.
[ he says, leaning in to bunt their foreheads playfully together. ]
I meant it when I said I wanted to continue this.
[ he wasn't sure if dan heng would want to as well, once his heat wore away, but.. he's glad to find that his desires haven't changed. they'll have a lot to navigate, and it'll be difficult, but.. worth it, he thinks. ]
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He sighs, and tightens his grip on the other man's hands for just a moment. ]
Good. Because I meant it too. So... we'll figure it out from here.
[ Ugh. He's stalling. It's obvious he's stalling. He doesn't want to go home, even though he needs to. Study catch-up aside, he's pretty confident he left a sweaty pile of clothes on the floor... ]
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if things continue to progress well, they'll revisit having a place together. until then, dan heng can visit any time he needs. they'll see each other often enough, the band doesn't go on tour until next year. there's time. ]
We will. Thanks for trusting me.
[ he says, pressing a kiss to dan heng's lips, then another, slow and soft. ]
C'mon, let's get you home.
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Yeah, [ he agrees, and he opens the door—
and perhaps the problem with his smile is that one of all of three other people who knows him well enough to completely understand is the exact person standing in front of the door as it opens to let him out, arms folding over his chest.
Dan Heng's steps grind to a halt, and his mouth opens a little too far. ]
Uh. Gege.
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yes. gege.
dan feng responds, his eyes narrowing as he glances from dan heng to yingxing to dan heng again, his fury only barely concealed. yingxing's mouth drops open, and he is at a complete loss for words for a moment, soon clearing his throat and running a hand back through his pale hair, his face hot. few people can put the fear of the gods into him like dan feng can. normally yingxing is one of the only people who can handle him during one of his rants, but this time dan feng's anger is pointed at him.
this time, he knows he's fucked up. ]
A-ah.. Dan Feng - [ he starts, clears his throat again. ] You're.. Dan Heng was just -
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[ He pitches in, finishes Yingxing's statement even as he trails to a dead halt, because there's no point in lying, not when it will only make things worse for them both to do so. His breath shudders as he takes it, but he keeps his eyes on his brother's face all the same, not allowing himself to back down despite how furious Dan Feng looks. ]
I suppose you can see for yourself that yes, this is the friend whose house I went to. [ Then, gentle but insistent in tone: ] I told you it was someone I trusted, right?
[ It's not much of an argument, but it's the only one he has. Dan Feng should trust Yingxing too, hasn't he always? ]
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trusted. you trusted a man over a decade your senior, who should have known better than to take advantage of you.
yingxing flinches, but doesn't argue it, only sighs through his nose. he and dan feng trust each other, yes, which is all the more reason that yingxing should have thought twice about this, about how dan feng might feel about it, about the fact that dan heng is young, was in heat - ugh. it's trust that he's damaged, now. ]
Ah-Feng, I..
[ dan feng shakes his head, steps forward to take dan heng's wrist, standing between the two of them.
don't ah-feng me. you deliberately hid this from me. how am i supposed to feel about that? come - let's go. ]
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No, wait.
[ If he didn't expect opposition, he certainly won't expect defiance, the determination written into his younger brother's eyes as he looks between the two of them. ]
This isn't Yingxing's fault. I know I'm young, but I'm the one who made the choice to come here. I'm the one who asked for help. And it... [ Well, they were going to have to tell him eventually... ] it wasn't only about my heat anyway, gege. I came here because I wanted to.
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his expression softens.
.. you're confused, Dan Heng. A first heat is always this way.
his grasp on dan heng's wrist tightens, trying to keep him close. he's angry, yes, and clearly feeling betrayed, but he loves dan heng more than anyone, and his concern is clear.
yingxing, meanwhile, keeps his gaze down. what can he say? his guilt tells him that dan feng is entirely correct, that he shouldn't have taken dan heng to bed, that he was an idiot to even think it wasn't anything but him being a horny creep. ]
Ah-Feng, we weren't planning to keep it a secret. We were going to tell you, just - just after.
[ dan feng shoots him a hard look.
I think you've done enough, haven't you? ]
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His free hand lifts, covers the hand grasping at his wrist, and this time there's less wilfulness in his gaze but something quieter, more logical. ]
Please don't—I'm not confused, ge. I've liked Yingxing for a long time. well before my first heat. And.. he's telling the truth. Actually, he was the one who insisted we had to tell you. I just wanted to get through my heat first. I—we both—understand that the situation is difficult, and that it would need a discussion, but my heat was the wrong time to do that, so...
[ He sighs. ]
I'm not expecting you to like this right away, but don't be angry with him when I was the one who came here in the first place.
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Didi, whether or not you came here on your own doesn't matter. You weren't -
in a place to consent. not properly. he came to yingxing under duress, and as an older, more responsible man, yingxing should have turned him away. that dan heng has been interested in him for a long time.. dan feng sighs, and rubs his face with his free hand.
No, I don't like it, and I cannot fathom how you could think I wouldn't be angry with him, but I see you're going to be stubborn about this, and I'm too exhausted to argue any further.
he's been working hard all week, after all, between worrying himself sick over dan heng.
Just.. you used protection, yes?
yingxing freezes. ]
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After all, Dan Feng always told him not to chase after rock stars.
It seems like it might be over enough that they can leave it for another day, when...
you used protection, yes?
...and even if he thought he could possibly brush the topic off, the way Yingxing freezes just behind him makes the answer far too evident.
Dan Heng sighs. Maybe if he frames it in a positive light... ]
I'm on the pill. And T. Between them they should be enough but just in case, we started using condoms after the first night, and I made an appointment with my physician.
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You..
silence follows. it is not a good silence. it is not a pleasant, comfortable silence. dan feng looks positively murderous.
After the first night.
dan feng's jaw clenches tightly, his burning gaze fixed on yingxing with laser focus, the tips of his long ears hot red. ah, and they were so close to meeting in the middle here, in a way. almost. almost. releasing dan heng's wrist, he stalks to yingxing, his voice eerily calm.
You had better pray every night that your negligence did not bear fruit.
yingxing's throat works around a deep swallow. he knows dan feng well enough to know that he shouldn't argue. not about this. the two of them bicker quite often, but this is entirely different. ]
.. Understood.
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[ Like his brother, Dan Heng has started to turn red—though in his case, it's out of embarrassment. If he sounds mortified when he speaks, it's because he is... and yet there's nothing else for him to say. He can't argue, not about this—not when he knows that with this at least they've made a mistake. But..
Fuck, this whole thing is the worst kind of mess.
He looks over at Yingxing, pained apology written onto his expression. It's an apology owed, but no doubt saying it aloud will just make things even worse. He can only hope the older man sees it, understands.
And that he's not pregnant.
And that he can find a way to talk Dan Feng around. ]
Gege, [ he says, his voice soft. And because he thinks it's the only way of getting out of here with Yingxing alive: ] Can we go?
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it's fine. he's suffered dan feng's wrath before, he'll suffer it again.
Oh, now you want to go.
he says sharply, then sighs, because it's dan heng, and he can't be angry with him for very long, especially when he sounds soft like that. with one last scathing look toward yingxing, he takes dan feng's hand and stalks back through the doorway.
Let's go. ]
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The younger brother wonders, mutinously, if he intends to lock him up there, like some princess in a faerie tale or other immersia.
But he doesn't say anything, not until they're in Dan Feng's car, answering silence with silence until the door shuts behind his older brother, until the engine starts with a low hum. ]
You weren't there to see his face, gege. [ His voice is quiet, but his tone is decisive. Sure. ] He was horrified. It hadn't crossed his mind at all. And I... as much as you're hoping I'm not pregnant, I'm hoping that even more, but...
[ He frowns. How is he meant to word this? ]
That shock tells me he wasn't just being careless. It was more that.. it's like he didn't think about it because he still saw me as man, despite all the physical evidence to the contrary.
[ He looks up at his brother with a small, tentative smile. ]
And if that's true, it makes me happy.
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but he still listens. tries to understand, even if he's still furious. ]
Dan Heng..
[ another sigh, and dan feng frowns through the windshield as he stops at an intersection. ]
I know you're technically an adult, but you're still so young. How can you know what happiness with another person is, yet? You've never even dated before. You haven't even dated him.
[ his brow furrows, and now that his anger has fizzled away a bit, all that's left is stark concern. dan heng is smart, he's so smart, but he's also very, very naive in many ways, and that can be dangerous. in the end, he'll have to make his own mistakes to learn, but accidentally getting pregnant when he's barely old enough to drink is a big way to learn. ]
Whether or not he was careless, in the end, is irrelevant. He took you to bed, someone over ten years younger than him who couldn't properly consent - that alone was a poor choice, let alone not even thinking to use protection, regardless of your gender. What if you caught something from him? He's a rock star, didi.
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...Are you saying I don't actually know that what I'm feeling is happiness? I was talking about one small thing, gege, I wasn't doing that stupid lovelorn thing you seem to think I'm doing. I don't know what happiness is with another person, but I won't ever know that if I don't give myself a chance. Right?
[ It's logical, he thinks... but so too is what Dan Feng says next, poiting out the mistakes Yingxing made—the mistakes they both made. ]
What does it matter if it was a poor choice? It was a mistake. It wasn't something he did on purpose. We know we started things backward and...
[ Ugh. He feels like he's on the back foot here. Defense, defense, defense. Is there any way that his older brother can possibly understand just how much he likes Yingxing? ]
We talked about it, actually. We... we'd both like to try going on dates.
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[ he's known about dan heng's little crush on his favorite rock star for awhile, which is why dan feng had eyed yingxing the moment he started making moves on his little brother. it's a delicate power dynamic, one between a celebrity and a fan, and he doesn't want to see dan heng hurt because of it.
of course, he loves and trusts yingxing, but.. much of that trust has been damaged, now.
dan feng sighs, closing his eyes for a brief moment until the light changes, and he begins to glide forward again. ]
Didi.. I had one ask. And that ask was to stay away from rock stars. Even my own friends.
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That's... that's different. March bought that for me, it wasn't...
[ He sighs, and leans forward in his seat, closing his eyes. ]
I know. But I can't... this isn't really... I can't control who I like, gege. I wasn't looking for this to happen. But I... but he just...
[ Another sigh, as Dan Heng shakes his head. ]
I'm sorry, gege.
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they slide into the driveway, and dan feng puts the car in park. ]
.. I suppose if you are going to be dating a rock star, one that I know is better than one that I do not.
[ he says, softly, then reaches to place a hand over one of dan heng's. ]
I know I can't stop you. Especially not now. Just.. please. Be careful.
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I...
[ He's not sure what he was expecting, but it certainly wasn't for Dan Feng to soften as quickly as he has. He turns his hand, wraps his fingers around his brother's. ]
I will be, I promise. I just...
[ Another sigh as he shakes his head. ]
Thank you for... for trying to understand, gege. I know it's not what you want for me, but...
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[ he huffs, then gives dan heng's hand a squeeze and kills the ignition, unclipping his seatbelt so they can unload themselves from the car. ]
Come inside, then, I'll make you something to eat.
[ if he can't keep dan heng from throwing himself at a rock star, he can at least fuss over him in other ways. ]
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Kind and understanding. Right. After he physically went to Yingxing's place to hunt him down..
He says nothing of the sort. Instead, he nods as he follows his older brother inside and sits at the table. Despite sleeping well last night, he's still tired, body aching and exhausted from the paces he and Yingxing put it through over the last week.
While his brother works on food for him, he reaches for his phone and types out a quick message: ]
It's okay. He's not really that mad anymore.
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thankfully is isn't a long wait. ]
really? surprising lol. are you okay?
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He was terrified, too, and he knows Dan Feng would never hurt him. ]
Yeah, I'm okay. I was just honest with him. That this wasn't just a week of randomly fucking, that I want to go on dates with you. He doesn't like the thought of me going out with a rock star but he admitted it's better if it's someone he knows.
He was definitely begrudging about it. You might not be fully off the hook just yet. But... I think he's going to stop fighting me on it.
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thats good. he'll.. understand, eventually, once he really begins to believe that i'm not going to jerk you around.
he just knows how this lifestyle can be.
[ and they made some choices. yingxing would probably feel the same if he were in dan feng's shoes. ]
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[ He'll be embarrassed later by the silly little smile on his face, the idea that Dan Feng can see it if he so much as glances in his direction. ]
I know he's just trying to protect me. I don't blame him for that. It's always just been the two of us, so he wants to make sure I'm safe. And like you said, he knows how it is to be in your situation.
But he's willing to hear me out at least so. That's good. So...
[ Gah. Now he's feeling shy again. ]
I guess when you're free, I'd like to take you up on that date thing.
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lucky for you we don't go on tour until next year, so aside from rehearsals, im not too busy.
[ a few events to attend - he's still quite busy by any normal standard - but not like he normally is. ]
let me take you out this friday. where do you wanna go?
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[ It's easier to tease back when he doesn't have to meet Yingxing's eyes while he does it.
But... this Friday? That's... well. He's definitely smiling at his phone. ]
I'm not particularly fussy. But it should be somewhere that you can exist without being approached by a bunch of people.
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[ there's a brief moment as yingxing goes over their options, and considers dan heng's taste. ]
how about the aquarium? i can get us in after hours.
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You can?
If that's the case, and it's not going to put anyone out, then I'd really like that.
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[ but he doesn't think dan heng cares about that, or the gift shop, so much as just seeing the animals. ]
there are people there 24/7 to take care of the animals, so there will be someone there to let us out whenever we're finished.
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In that case, let me handle the food? Seeing as you cooked for me last time.
Maybe we can have a picnic dinner in the space in front of the main tank.
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sounds good. ill pick you up at 9?
oh, and you can stay over if you want, too. bring something to sleep in if that's what you want. no pressure.
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I'd like that. Let's hope ge doesn't explode when I tell him that's the plan.
[ And so he looks up again, at where his brother is preparing food. ]
...About that date I mentioned...
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so yingxing pulls up at exactly nine o'clock in his personal starskiff, sleek and humming at the dock attached to dan heng's apartment complex. it's a friday night, so the sky is busy, humming with activity, and the dock is packed, so yingxing is sure to take down the roof so dan heng can see him, his stark white hair familiar and easy to spot, even if he's got his sunglasses on for the moment to briefly shield his identity.
he's looking forward to this. ]
Hey, over here! Ah Heng.
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He's dressed relatively casually, wearing black slacks and a form-fitting black shirt over his binder, a loose white overshirt worn over the top. He's wearing his human "disguise", as different from Dan Feng as he can possibly be while still being himself.
He smiles when he spies the starskiff, hurrying over so he can climb in—and offering the other man a small, warm smile. ]
Hi. [ A pause, and then: ] You look really good.
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So do you.
[ he mirrors, then dips his head to kiss him, slow and warm and soft. maybe it should wait until the end of their first date, really, but yingxing couldn't possibly wait that long. it's only been a few days, but those days have felt very long. ]
Got everything you need for tonight?
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It's illogical to even think it, but he's pretty sure his heart is fluttering in his chest.
When they separate, he looks up at Yingxing in silence for a moment, taking a second to realize that the older man has asked him a question—and then laughing at his own expense, lifting what looks like a sports bag. ]
Mm, yeah. There's stuff here for dinner, and I have a change of clothes for tomorrow.
[ It's embarrassing how hard it is to pull his gaze away from Yingxing. ]
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[ dan heng is cute, looking at him the way that he is, and yingxing can't help his smile, or the warm way his heart lifts. things may have had a bumpy start, but he's happy. he wants this. ]
Let's get going, then.
[ he locks the doors, kisses dan heng one last time, then releases him to maneuver the starskiff away from the busy dock and out into the skies. the aquarium isn't too far from here, but friday night traffic makes things a little slow going - even still, it isn't very long before they're touching down at the aquarium's dock, sliding into a space in the empty parking bay.
turning, he lifts his own bag over his shoulder. ]
Ready?
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They've just set foot outside the car when there's a voice, shrill and excited, calling Yingxing's name, and Dan Heng blinks as a girl comes rushing up to them out of nowhere, putting herself square in the rock star's way to start talking with him.
Dan Heng bites his lip and holds back. He's seen this happen before, with Dan Feng, but... this is a little different... ]
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Uh.. hey. You know this place is closed, right?
[ he says, frowning, rubbing his nape with his free hand. ]
You should probably get going before you get in trouble.
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She starts to babble, asking for him to sign something, or perhaps to stay and talk with her for a bit...
Dan Heng bites his lip, holding back as he watches the two of them, not really sure what he's meant to say or do. ]
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it doesn't matter. yingxing offers a smile, but he shakes his head. ]
I'm a little busy right now.
[ he says, sliding his hand free of hers to settle it on dan heng's back instead. ]
Somewhere to be. But I'll tell you what, there's a fan meetup next friday at Aurum Alley, I'll sign something for you there, okay?
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"A fan meetup..."
The disappointment on her face is visible, but she lowers her hands despite being tempted to reach for him, her eyes flicking between him and Dan Heng.
"...Can I at least have a photo?" ]
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but he has to consider dan heng's feelings, too. he knew what he was getting into by dating a rock star, sure, but this is their first date, and he wants dan heng to feel as special as he is. he could tell the truth, that this is a date, and he needs to pay attention to his partner, but he has no idea if dan heng wants that information made public, it's not something they've discussed. yingxing heaves a sigh. ]
How about I give you two photos at the fan meetup, and a backstage pass to our next show for a meet and greet? Then you can get photos with all the rest, too.
[ seems like a fair offer, right? ]
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Ah...! Really? Then... I'll look forward to it! Remember me, okay? My name's Sushang... don't forget!
[ And with a brilliant, victorious smile in Dan Heng's direction, she darts off again, leaving the two of them standing there in silence for a moment. ]
I... wow. We should... we should get inside, huh. So that that doesn't happen again...
[ It's not that he minds being seen with Yingxing, but he doesn't want to cause him any trouble... ]
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Yeah.. let's go.
[ he says, sliding his hand down to the small of dan heng's back so he can lead him toward the aquarium's front doors, where security leads them inside. the lights are a little low, and it's very quiet, save for the hum of a hundred powerful filters, but it's nice. the atmosphere is peaceful.
with a smile, yingxing leaves his bag at the security station up front, assuring dan heng that he can do the same - that they'll be back for them after they tour the place. and then.. ]
Well, ready to go see everyone?
[ the animals, they're everyone. ]
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It's beautiful, here. Quiet. He's happy to be here with Yingxing, to explore the place together, now that they're alone.
And so to the other's question, he inclines his head. Nods. ]
It hasn't even really started yet and I already know how perfect this date is going to be. [ He smiles. ] I'm ready.
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Yeah, it is.
[ it was a pretty good idea, he thinks, if he does say so himself. he'll have to work hard to make sure the next date is just as good. leaning his head down, yingxing touches their brows together with a hum. ]
Lead the way, then.
[ this is more dan heng's wheelhouse than his own, after all. ]
We've got all night to see anything you want to see.
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It's wonderful.
It hardly seems like any time at all—and yet, when he looks at his watch, it's been at least a few hours—before they reach the main tank, wall-to-wall glass in front of a small auditorium-like area, lit in dim blues from the water and nothing else. He makes his way to the center of the floor, where, thankfully, the staff have come to bring his bag over, letting him take out the things he needs for the picnic: sandwiches, bottled drinks, pasta salads and potato salads in bowls, a few other similar things. He lays the spread out and takes a seat, offering Yingxing a smile. ]
Look good?
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watching dan heng's face light up as he speaks is even more beautiful.
but soon enough their stomachs are growling, so they make their way to the main tank, where their bags are waiting for them. dan heng sets out the spread, and yingxing grins. ]
Looks great. You outdid yourself. [ he snags a sandwich for himself, and a bowl of pasta salad. ] Thanks for making all of this for us.
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I don't know how long they'll let us stay, but I wouldn't mind sitting here for a while and watching them swim. [ He smiles up at the other man. ] Would that be okay with you? This date is for both of us, so I don't want to.... [ He bites his lip. ] You've been really patient with me. I want to make sure you're enjoying yourself too.
[ Because as for him, Yingxing couldn't have picked a better place for them to enjoy. ]
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I've been enjoying every moment. I'm not trying to be patient, I'm just enjoying my time here with you, that's all. This might be more your scene than mine, but that doesn't mean I can't enjoy it. Who doesn't like aquariums?
[ he gestures to the glass, to the numerous beautiful fish darting through the water, a large, speckled ray, the colorful corals.. ]
Oh, and - right, the surprise. [ he grins. ] We're staying as long as we like. Well, until morning, at least.
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Wait. A surprise? His head tilts, and then in the next moment his eyes widen. Staying until morning? He brought night clothes with him but... ]
Where will we sleep?
[ He blinks, realizing too late how that sounded. ]
Ah, I mean. I'm excited, I am. This is really wonderful, Yingxing... Honestly, I kind of... We could sleep here, it's beautiful.
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[ he pats the space beside him, then gestures to the pack he brought with him, and the second, too, that had been brought in by security - one that yingxing dropped off earlier. a large bag, full of something that looks soft. ]
I thought you might like to fall asleep watching the tank.
[ he smiles, finishing off his sandwich and washing it down with some water. ]
Sound good? We can go back to mine or yours instead, if you prefer.
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It sounds perfect. I can't... you thought of everything.
[ He settles back, and the soft smile on his lips is genuine, for Yingxing's eyes only. ]
This is an amazing first date. I'm... I don't even know what to say.
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You don't have to say anything. I'm just glad you're enjoying it.
[ he says, his smile fond and lopsided, one hand lifting to sift through dan heng's hair, callused thumb smoothing over the warm apple of his cheek. he's so cute, so beautiful, like this, or in his other skin - yingxing enjoys both, likes both, likes dan heng. ]
I just wanted you to have a good time.
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[ It's breathed back in response, Dan Heng's head tilting into the softness of those touches, a soft smile on his lips. He wonders how he'll ever be able to think of dates anywhere near as good as this, or how he can...
He pauses, thoughts interrupted by a wandering thought, and he bites his lip. ]
Was it difficult, before? With that girl? I don't want to put you in an awkward position with your fans. I.. I know how much they look up to you.
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[ that's what he wanted to hear. the way dan heng tilts his head into yingxing's touch is warming, and he hums, gently tapping the end of dan heng's nose before he pulls away to begin attending to their dinner again. ]
Hm? Ah, no, you didn't do anything wrong.
[ yingxing is quick to shake his head. ]
It's.. I'm just sorry it happened. Poor timing. Unfortunately it's something you might have to get used to.
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I don't mind it. I knew this would be part of it. I just... don't want you to feel as if you're in a difficult position, that's all. With me being there.
[ His nose wrinkles. He knows what he's trying to say, but he worries he's being assumptive, too. Or that it will sound like he's asking for more than he is. Or... ]
I know you have a reputation to worry about.
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[ yingxing's brow creases. ]
What about my reputation?
[ what does that mean? because of dan heng's age, maybe? ]
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A breath. Yingxing hadn't seemed uncomfortable putting a hand on Dan Heng's back before, but... ]
A place like this, at the time we were arriving.. I think it would be obvious to a lot of people that it's a date. And I know it's not the first time you've publically taken someone on a date, but... I'm a guy.
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So what? I'm not worried about that. I've been with guys before, though.. I guess it's been awhile.
[ most of his bigger, more notable relationships have been with women, after all, most of them other celebrities. not enough men are "out" in the business for it to have been easy for him to date any of them - casual hookups were the most that happened, and many preferred that it not get out to their fans. but yingxing hardly cares. ]
Honestly, I don't give a fuck what people think. So long as you're comfortable with it, I didn't intend to keep it a secret. That said.. it's a lot, you know. Being known for dating a celebrity. It'll pull you into the spotlight more than you might want.
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He shakes his head. ]
In case you forgot, I'm kind of used to having to deal with the spotlight to a certain extent. I learned to hide from it in this case because people keep thinking I am my brother. But... I have no reason to hide from you. I just... wanted to make sure it wasn't something that could cause you any problems.
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For what it's worth, I never saw it as you hiding from me. Looking like someone as popular as your brother isn't easy, when you're just trying to live your life and get through school.
[ he reaches out, playing with dan heng's fringe, nudging the tip of his nose with the pad of his thumb. ]
But you don't need to worry. Nothing about you is going to cause me any problems.
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Mm, I didn't quite mean that. I think after my heat, there was never going to be hiding from you anyway. What I meant is...
[ He frowns. How to say it? ]
I don't feel the need to hide from... from this. [ From what they are. ] Even if it means I have to be in the spotlight a little more than I usually like, I...
You make it worth it, Yingxing.
[ And he leans in, brushing a soft kiss against the corner of the other's mouth. ]
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Mm.. well.
[ he murmurs, still staying close, cupping dan heng's cheek with the hand that had been near it. ]
We'll figure it out together then, hmm?
[ another kiss, slow and soft. ]
I really like you, Dan Heng. I don't want anything to get in the way of it.
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Figure it out together, huh? I like the sound of that.
[ He hums into the kiss, pulls back to rest his forehead against Yingxing's. ]
I really like you too. I know we started things a little strangely, but... this is a perfect first date. [ A soft chuckle. ] I think I said that already.
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We're being really gross.
[ but it isn't a complaint. he doesn't mind it, doesn't mind it at all. he likes it. he might be a rock star, who has spent more than his fair share of time indulging in the lifestyle, but.. in truth, he's a bit of a sap sometimes, when it comes to the people that he cares about. ]
And I want to keep kissing you, so you should probably eat your dinner so I can do that, hmm?
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Biting his lip, he leans back—but not before stealing another quick kiss from the corner of the older man's mouth—and then reaches for some of the food. ]
I brought dessert too, if you want that. Or we can save that for later.
[ he says, before popping some of his meal into his mouth. ]
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Mm, maybe later tonight. This is going to fill me up pretty well.
[ maybe after they work off some of the calories first, he means.. but he won't say that. not yet, at least. they're having a sweet moment, he won't go making it filthy. dan heng might not even be into banging in an aquarium.
he should abandon this train of thought, ahem. ]
You should make food for me more often.
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Yes, he can definitely cook more often. ]
You'll have to tell me your favorites, [ he agrees. ] It's okay if they're not easy. I don't mind learning new recipes, or having to practice them.
[ He falls silent to eat a little more, enjoying his own serves of the salads and finishing off his sandwich. He has no idea where Yingxing's brain has gone—a good thing, especially for right now. ]
This time we had a picnic, so maybe next time you can come to my place and I'll cook something there.
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That sounds great. I'd like to see your place.
[ he says, his eyes flicking from the rippling waters back to dan heng again, an easy smile curving his mouth. as beautiful as the wildlife is to watch, dan heng is more beautiful still. ]
We'll do that for sure. Assuming you want a second date.
[ he grins, teasing, then leans to kiss dan heng's cheek, before he's getting to his feet to begin gathering up the things they'll need to sleep, opening up the second pack to lay out thick sleeping bags and pillows, with a fluffy blanket over them both. ]
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Of course I want a second date. We're still on the first one and I'm already thinking about how it might go.
[ His cheeks color a little at the admission. ]
I really like you, Yingxing. I wasn't joking about that, or exaggerating about my feelings.
[ Still blushing, he starts to pack up the picnic dinner, putting things away so that the other has room to set up the bedding. ]
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I know, I was just teasing you.
[ this date has gone so well so far that he's sure he had a second one in the bag. at least he'd hoped. but these dates feel almost superfluous honestly - they both know that they're so into each other that they don't need the dates to prove it.
but they're nice anyway, a good way to spend time together and learn more about one another, though really, they've been friends for so long now that they know one another pretty well. it doesn't matter. these moments are nice. sitting on the fluffy bedding, yingxing slides his shoes off and sets them aside. ]
It'll go great, though.
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[ Dan Heng wonders if the corners of his mouth are going to get tired. He doesn't think he's smiled this much in... well, ever, but with Ren here it's almost like he can't stop. He feels young and silly, and... ]
Ah, this is...
[ His eyes cast up to the tank, looking through the dim at the fish swimming. It's beautiful, almost magical is the way they can see it even without being below the waves. There's a small, sudden part of him that wishes they could go swimming.
Maybe they should go to the beach, sometime. They can swim, maybe make love in the waves—
His cheeks color before he even finishes the thought, and Dan Heng moves to slip off his own shoes, getting comfortable on the bedding next to Yingxing. For someone who previously wondered if he was actually just asexual, it feels like his libido has gotten crazy of late... ]
Someday I'll get used to you teasing me. I'm sure.
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Heh, sorry. I can try to stop if it bothers you.
[ but it won't be easy. yingxing is the type to show affection through teasing, and the more he likes someone, the more he teases them, so poor dan heng is right at the brunt of it all. with a slanting smile, he watches dan heng, the cool blue light of the tank illuminating his face. ]
Mostly, though.. I'm glad you had a good time tonight.
[ he says, his expression soft and warm. ]
I did too.
[ even if he's not a nerd like dan heng, everyone loves this sort of thing. even kids enjoy seeing the fish, the penguins, the sharks. ]
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It doesn't bother me. It used to, because I was scared you'd get close enough to figure me out. But... I've long given up hiding from you.
[ Aeons, he can only think about how stupid and sappy he's become as he reaches out, curling his fingers into the other man's. ]
I'm glad you enjoyed this, though. I was worried it would be too nerdy.
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Nah. Aquariums are for everyone. It's beautiful here.
[ nuzzling dan heng's knuckles, yingxing hums, then drops to lie back on the blankets, scooping dan heng along with him. ]
I had a great time.
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Me too. And where we are now... we picked the best spot to eat... and to sleep. It's beautiful.
[ He looks up, taking a moment to admire the wash of colors against the older man's skin. ]
The reflection of the water makes your hair look blue.
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yingxing laughs. ]
Oh yeah? Think I should dye it?
[ he grins, dragging his thumb lightly along dan heng's jaw. ]
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Maybe for a promotion or two, if you really wanted to. It makes your eyes kind of glow. But... overall, I'm happy with you as you are.
[ He lets his hands drag up the front of Yingxing's shirt, curling contentedly into the fabric. ]
Looks, personality, everything. Even the teasing, like I said.
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[ yingxing says, and smiles, because he knew this about dan heng even before they began dating. for as stoic and withdrawn as the young man might seem, he's very soft, his heart is tender and gentle, and he cares a great deal for the people around him. it's easy to notice, once you get to know him a little.
yingxing isn't quite the same. despite his brash and confident personality and natural charisma, he's slow to trust, and carries a lot of anger that's difficult to smother. people like dan heng.. deserve to be protected, deserve the world. ]
I'm not perfect, but I'm glad you think that. [ he brushed a lick of stray hair behind dan heng's ear. ] I feel the same about you.
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He hums, and shakes his head. ]
I'm not perfect either. That... I suppose that makes us both biased, in our own way.
[ Which means, he thinks, that Dan Feng will see it soon enough too. It might just take some time for him to get there. ]
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Just a little.
[ he says with a chuckle, then uses one bent knuckle to tip dan heng's chin upward, lifting it so he can lean in to kiss him, slowly, softly. it's a warm kiss, not pushing for more, but leaving the door open so that dan heng can take the initiative if he wants to.
humming, he nips gently at dan heng's lower lip. ]
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But also...
Dan Heng shifts a little, allowing himself the freedom to splay out over the other man, nipping at Yingxing's lip in return as he sighs in content, comntinuing to stroke his hand over the other's chest, exploring and teasing at once. ]
Should we change clothes....?
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Yeah, I guess we probably should.
[ he says, then slips his hands right up the back of dan heng's shirt, callused palms and fingers smoothing over his warm, bared skin. his smile curls at one end, and he arches a little beneath him, pushing his chest up against the press of dan heng's hands. ]
Need some help?
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To the question, he finds himself shaking his head, both of his hands moving—and instead of actually going to strip the older man, they trace the lines of his muscle through his shirt instead. Teasing, perhaps, but exploring and enjoying first and foremost. ]
Mm, you can help if you want but I'm enjoying myself like this.
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Mm, well.. I just enjoy undressing you.
[ and for all they'd fucked like rabbits not so long ago, there hadn't been too much opportunity to actually undress dan heng. by the end, neither of them really bothered to put clothes on too often, even to eat, given how quickly they came off again.
his hands slip upward, over the clasps of dan heng's binder, thumbing one open. ]
This okay?
[ now that he's out of his heat, dan heng might want to keep his binder on, so he has to be sure. ]
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only for the rest of his logic to catch up in the next moment, leaving him blushing even as he buries his face in the other's shoulder, laughing softly to himself. ]
Yes. Yes, of course it's okay.
[ After all, if someone were to see them, his breasts would be the single least thing to worry about, of course.
He leans up to press a kiss to the underside of the other man's chin. ]
For the record, I enjoy undressing you too. I was just enjoying your muscles for a bit.
[ And he reaches up to Yingxing's shirt again, this time to work on the buttons. ]
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[ for himself, yeah, but if dan heng can enjoy his body then all the better! yingxing isn't above preening beneath the attention, all but purring as dan heng touches him, kisses him, nuzzling against his skin.
with a satisfied sigh, yingxing carefully undoes each clasp of dan heng's binder, letting the pressure ease off as it loosens, until at last it falls open and yingxing has miles of skin to enjoy. he palms up dan heng's back, rubbing between his shoulderblades, feeling the little dips where the binder's elastic sank into his skin. ]
.. do you ever think you'll go for it? Surgery, I mean.
[ he says, rubbing at the skin where he's sure it must be itchy now that the binder is loosened. smiling, he does not interfere while dan heng unbuttons his shirt, one by one. ]
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I've thought about it, [ he admits after a moment. ] I always told myself it didn't matter, because the only person who saw me was me.
[ He's never really been interested in anyone else, after all, not to this degree. And he never imagined this would actually happen... ]
But... I don't know. Maybe I will, now.
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It's a huge decision, you should make it for yourself and yourself only. Anyone who really cares about you won't care what your chest looks like.
[ if it were dan heng's own dysphoria that would be one thing, but yingxing doesn't want him feeling influenced by anyone else. granted, someone else seeing and touching his breasts might cause dysphoria in and of itself, maybe that's what dan heng is talking about. ]
You're gorgeous, no matter how you have to shape yourself to feel comfortable.
[ smiling, yingxing continues to rub the pink, raw skin where the binder dug in, his own skin revealed with each open button, until his shirt falls open. ]
Whatever you choose though, you'll have plenty of support.
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Somehow, having the other man reaffirm that he doesn't need to do it for him, though, that just makes him feel all that much better. It makes him smile to himself as he finishes undoing Yingxing's shirt and pushes it aside, lazily leaning down to press a few kisses to the bared skin. ]
It is for me. I can't really explain why, but it is. [ He glances up at the other, expression quietly warm. ] I know you don't care. It... I realized that right away. Right from the beginning you've just accepted me for who I am, so...
[ His cheeks color. Aeons, he's getting sappy... ]
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Good. As long as it's for you, that's all that matters.
[ dan heng shouldn't change for anyone, especially when major surgery is involved. whatever he needs to do in order to feel like the person he needs to be is good, and yingxing would be proud to be with him every step of the way, or even if dan heng chooses not to, decides that the binder is enough.
and there he goes, being sappy again. it's so sweet. anyone who knows dan heng well knows that his heart is gentle and kind, but it's surprising when compared with his usual stoic disposition. what a sweet guy he is. ]
You're really tough.
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I'm not really tough, [ he says after a moment's thought. ] I'm exactly as tough as I need to be. It's not always... Some days are harder than others. But the magic helps a lot, and... Dan Feng has always been amazing, and...
[ And then there's the part where he's with someone who sees him with no hesitation as beautiful, too. That helps a lot also. He doesn't say that, though. Just smiles private to himself, his fingers catching in the fastenings of Yingxing's pants. ]
I feel loved, regardless of anything. And that helps.
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Just because you have good support doesn't mean you aren't tough.
[ the struggle is dan heng's entirely, only he can wrestle with it. but nevertheless, yingxing is grateful for dan feng, grateful for dan heng's friends, for everyone who has helped support him so he can blossom into the person that he is.
yingxing's breath catches when dan heng tugs at his belt, his eyelids low. ]
But I get it. I'm glad you've found good people to help hold you up.
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Mm. It's nice. And...
Well, he wasn't going to say anything, but perhaps being open with him is a reward of its own. When he's finished unbuckling Yingxing's belt, hands moving to the top of his pants to push them off his hips, he looks up to offer the older man a smile. ]
Something that's really nice is that there's this guy I like who called me "beautiful" when he saw me naked for the first time.
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.. oh yeah? Well, I'd say that guy has great taste.
[ chuckling softly, he shifts his hips to help dan heng slide his jeans down off of his hips and legs - thankfully, despite being nicely fitted, they're not skin tight, so it's not too much of a challenge.
it's a good thing that yingxing knows the staff here. security will be tastefully looking away, for a time. his hands slide higher at last, sweeping dan heng's shirt and binder both over his head in one movement, warm skin pressed to warm skin. ]
And he's right, too.
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And not for the first time, it strikes him that they're in quite a public place.
He ducks his head against Yingxing's shoulder, allows the nervousness to sweep him up a little where he's otherwise been pushing it away. ]
I know there are security cameras in this room. Please tell me that they know to look the other way for a little while...
[ After all... now that they're laid out like this? Dan Heng thinks he wouldn't mind taking some time before getting dressed again.. ]
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Don't worry. No one is looking.
[ he says softly, then gestures with one hand toward the security camera tucked into the corner. it is pointed away, toward the wall, so even if someone did attempt a glance, they would see only darkness. ]
But if you're worried -
[ he snags the blanket, tucking it up around them both, so they're hidden well beneath it. ]
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Mm. No reason to worry, then. Right?
[ He shifts a little closer, leaning up to brush his mouth against the older man's. They're both still wearing a little clothing, but... ]
I've been thinking about this a little. Is it... too much?
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[ dan heng moves in closer, and yingxing's arms slide around him beneath the blanket, one hand splaying over his back, smoothing downward, following the curve of his spine. he tips up his chin to capture dan heng's lips, kissing him softly, but with warmth, deliberate. ]
Not at all. I've been thinking about it, too. More than I should, probably.
[ he's been thinking about dan heng in general, but it would be a lie to say he wasn't also thinking about this. ]
I'm a little crazy about you..
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[ Dan Heng's smile broadens as Yingxing's hand splays and smooths down over his spine. His own hands lift, wrapping around the older man's shoulders, tangling in his beautiful, pale hair. To the admission, he nods, nuzzling his nose against the other man's. ]
I... me too. Thinking about it more than I should. About you. I'm a little crazy too, and I know this is just a first date but..
[ He tangles his legs, still in his neat slacks, with Yingxing's. ]
Is it okay if I want you? Here?
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It's okay for you to want me anywhere, at any time.
[ and he means it. feels it. he's wild about dan heng, both romantically and physically, would never turn him down, not on the first date or the fiftieth. one hand slips up into that soft dark hair, and he pulls dan heng down for a kiss, soft and lingering, then a little harder, with a little more heat.
a low hum rolls in yingxing's chest, his free hand grasping dan heng's hip, pulling their bodies more tightly together. ]
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[ The word blooms in his chest, warm and content, as he's pulled into a kiss, soft and sweet and first but quickly heating up in a way that has a warm spark lighting in his belly, a slow pulse of warmth spreading from between his legs to warm the whole of him.
It distracts him from saying what's on his mind, that he'll always want Yingxing, anywhere and anytime, but perhaps that's okay, he thinks as the other's hand drags his hip in closer, their bodies becoming more flush to one another. ]
Mmn, yes...
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at last yingxing pushes forward, rolling dan heng to press him into the soft bedding. ]
Tell me what you've been thinking about.
[ he murmurs, kissing along dan heng's jaw, his throat, while his hips grind downward, against the heat between dan heng's legs. ]
What you've wanted to do..
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Aeons help him, what hasn't he been thinking about? It hasn't even been a full week since his heat ended, which means it hasn't been a full week since they were last together, and yet Dan Heng feels like his brain has been working on overdrive, imagining all the sorts of ways they could be together, fantasizing about going down on him again, or on being eaten out, or...
He takes a shuddering breath, fingers curling into Yingxing's hair as his hips arch upward into those grinding movements. ]
I... I've thought about going down on you again. And about you fucking me, and...
[ There's a pause, a dark coloration to his cheeks as the rest of that fantasy replays itself in his mind, words unspoken as his lips brush Yingxing's jaw. ]
Mm. Yeah.
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.. and?
[ yingxing's grin spreads across dan heng's skin, and he hums, his hands sliding down the sides of dan heng's underclothing, pushing it down his hips and thighs. ]
And what else?
[ he prompts, coaxing, as he kicks that clothing away, leaving dan heng beautifully bare for him. ]
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His lips purse, and his eyes look up into Yingxing's face for a moment, searching, thankful for the way the dim light in the room works to cover how dark his cheeks are becoming. Asking outright for what he wants feels so crass, but.. ]
I've thought about... what it might be like. How it would be different if.. if I'd been born a guy. How.. sex would be different.
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.. ah. I understand.
[ and it makes sense, that dan heng would want to feel that, would want to experience that. yingxing smiles down at him, smoothing his dark fringe back with one hand. ]
Well, first of all, you are a guy, no matter what parts you have. I hope you know that, and know that I see that. But that said..
[ he starts, then frowns. ]
- ah, shit, I didn't bring any lube.
[ of course, he remembered the condoms this time, but he hadn't been expecting anal!! ]
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And as for Yingxing, he can't help but notice how there's really no hesitation, how as usual the older man just takes everything in his stride, and that...
It makes him feel good. Enough that he's still smiling when the other mentions he doesn't have any lube.
Dan Heng reaches a hand up, brushes it against Yingxing's cheek before following it with a kiss. ]
I wanted you to know I've been thinking about it, but that doesn't mean it has to be tonight.
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[ whenever dan heng is ready, some time in his own bed, or in dan heng's, when they have the time to dedicate to making sure it's a good experience, comfortable and pleasurable. though he doesn't have a prostate, there are still ways to make it good for him.
for now, though, they have this. yingxing sinks down into another kiss, parting his lips over dan heng's to deepen it while his hands move, sliding over his lover's body, gentle and soft, feeling dan heng's curves and planes, all of his soft skin. ]
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[ That's more than alright with him. Especially when it doesn't stop them from enjoying themselves in another way (or ways) now, his own hands moving to explore Yingxing's body in turn—and, as they kiss, hooking his fingers into the other's waistband so that he can finally tug his underwear off him.
Once the garment reaches his hips, he keeps working at it with one hand; the other, instead, lifts to Yingxing's half-hard cock, fingers curling him to stroke over him. Slow, teasing, exploring. ]
Mm. [ It's a contented sound into their kiss, Dan Heng's tongue teasing over Blade's lower lip as he arches up into him. ]
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I'm so crazy about you..
[ he whispers against dan heng's soft mouth, resting his elbows down on either side of his head so he can more easily roll his hips, his cock filling out more with every stroke. ]
You make me feel insane..